Thursday’s Amateur Straight Guy J/O Video Pageant Of Realness

Here at Fleshbot, we understand that lust is a many-splendored thing. Some go for twinks, others like them chubby, and some--we're not naming names--dig inanimate objects like that hot new Braun coffeemaker in the break room. You know, the one with those sleek, sexy curves and that soft, perfectly rounded orifice from whence pours the hottest, richest coffee we've ever tasted ... But we digress.

Still, most of the gays we know would probably agree that watching straight boys in solo action is just plain hot. Whether it's the allure of forbidden fruit or that delectable frisson of watching them masturbate even though they thought putting "4 Da Ladiez ONLY!!!" in their video description meant that only ladiez would be watching them, straight guys offer something for everyone. (Unless, of course, you like to watch guys getting it on together--in which case, you might want to move on to another post.)

To prove our point, here's today's humpy handful of homespun hetero hand-fuckers ... in pageant form! So sit back, relax, put "Little Spanish Flea" on the turntable, and judge away.

Contestant #1 is Robbierod, a young brunette who loves popping off in his everyday duds. On the upside, he's an open-minded kind of guy, who may not be into fat chicks but digs the thick ones, "cause thick is sexy too." On the downside, Robbierod's got some grammar and self-esteem issues, as evidenced by his turn-ons, which include "off-roading in my two jeeps, videogames, [and] fucking with my big Dick". As for his special talent...

Contestant #2, Brightandearly, hails from the UK and boasts something tastier than spotted dick in his knickers. We love his Scottish accent (it is Scottish, isn't it?) and the way it evokes one of our favorite films, "The Prime of Miss Jean Brodie". We're less thrilled that one of his own film faves is "Gone in 60 Seconds". For his performance, Brightandearly offers a dramatic monologue entitled "Playin with Hot-N-Sticky"

Our last contestant is Strokeuright. He's practically an Xtube ingenue, but judging from what we've seen he's got a long, hard future ahead ahead of him. Clearly, he adds what we believe the kids call "flava" and an enviable schlong to the amateur mix; on the other hand all that talk of strokes has us smelling toast. Carrying the theme to its logical conclusion, he offers "stroke it out" for your enjoyment:

See? Were we right, or were we right? Cast your votes in the comments below and help us decide who gets the sash.