I had been looking forward to seeing the new film Pixels since I saw the trailer earlier this year but after reading the horrid reviews, I think I'll hold off. I know it's just other people's opinions but when the general consensus is it's a festering cow anus, you should probably listen. The idea of iconic video game characters attacking planet Earth is an idea ripe with infinite potential. What a fucking shame the guy who made the short film the movie's based on passed up offers from other studios to let Happy Madison do the honor of ruining it. Oh Adam Sandler. Billy Madison and Happy Gilmore never ceases to make me laugh my ass off but your output over the last 15 years has been pretty spotty. Your reign of suck has culminated with a movie featuring Pac-Man, Donkey Kong and Ashley Benson that I don't give a shit about seeing. Incredible achievement. Shame on you and the crony hacks you employ!
The weekend hasn't been a totally bummer. It's still Summertime, there's beer in the fridge and Britney Spears is flaunting her newly toned body on the beaches of Hawaii. If you told me there were pics of her in a bikini frolicking on the beach, I would've made a mean-spirited crack about how she's let herself go. That's because I'm a cynical piece of crap. Not only is Ms. Spears' in great shape, she's a hot piece of ass with a body to rival most twenty-somethings! (I hate the term MILF)
She's got a video game body!