“Anchorman: A XXX Parody” Is An Afternoon Delight

Hey, who here remembers when "Anchorman" was a really popular movie? New Sensations does, so now Ron Burgundy is moving from San Diego to Los Angeles where he has to make nice with Veronica Corningstone and her all-female team.

Since the original movie came out in 2004, it makes sense that Eddie Powell and New Sensations would skip the "Anchorman" storyline and concoct their own tale of Burgundian blunders. Will frat boys quote "Anchorman: A XXX Parody" with as much tenacity as they did the original? What clever catch phrases are headed our way? To be fair, we don't remember anything about "Anchorman," and we had to IMDb that film just to get the context straight. So here we go; let's travel back in time seven years.

Ron (Jack Lawrence) is trying to get situated in a new town, but before he can get a job, he has to suck up to Veronica Corningstone (Tasha Reign). Fortunately, this just means sucking gently at her clit. Tasha Reign does look quite a lot Christina Applegate when she's grimacing at the oafish Burgundy, but when she's taking cock, she's all Tasha. The two of them work out their differences with Tasha's face smushed into the retro comforter that we're pretty sure was purchased from PB Teen, and before you know it, Ron has his jizz on Tasha's chin and a job in the freaky world of Los Angeles journalism.

Dale DaBone picks up where Paul Rudd left off, taking the oversexed Brian Fontana to new levels of perviness. Yet he seems oddly calm and focused when he peels the polyester off Aiden Starr, and even though this all goes down in the back of his van, these two have a surprisingly tender and 100% uncreepy scene. Could it have been a little more sinister? Probably. Do you think Sex Panther by Odion was involved? We sincerely hope so. (Again, we had to look up a plot summary of "Anchorman" in order to fit a joke here. We vaguely remembered that there was a stinky cologne involved somewhere in the movie.)

Although their characters are totally made-up, we're excited to see what makes Dylan Ryan and Adriana Sephora get together because A) Dylan looks smoking hot as a blonde and B) we've been waiting for some brave woman to incorporate everybody's favorite beauty store in her porn pseudonym. Dylan's pearl necklace (an actual necklace, that is) gives her a touch of class and it easily turns into a string of anal beads! Quite creative, wouldn't you say?

We sincerely hope that "Anchorman: A XXX Parody" has writing as clever as its sex toy usage, because recycling and pornifying "Anchorman" quotes simply won't do. But we trust Eddie Powell! He's a sharp director and a fine judge of whiskey.

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Jack Lawrence and Tasha Reign
New Sensations (newsensations.com)
Buy "Anchorman: A XXX Parody" (store.fleshbot.com)
Jack Lawrence and Tasha Reign
New Sensations (newsensations.com)
Buy "Anchorman: A XXX Parody" (store.fleshbot.com)
Jack Lawrence and Tasha Reign
New Sensations (newsensations.com)
Buy "Anchorman: A XXX Parody" (store.fleshbot.com)
Jack Lawrence and Tasha Reign
New Sensations (newsensations.com)
Buy "Anchorman: A XXX Parody" (store.fleshbot.com)
Jack Lawrence and Tasha Reign
New Sensations (newsensations.com)
Buy "Anchorman: A XXX Parody" (store.fleshbot.com)
Jack Lawrence and Tasha Reign
New Sensations (newsensations.com)
Buy "Anchorman: A XXX Parody" (store.fleshbot.com)
Jack Lawrence and Tasha Reign
New Sensations (newsensations.com)
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Aiden Starr and Dale DaBone
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Aiden Starr and Dale DaBone
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Dana DeArmond, Erik Masterson, and Jack Lawrence
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Dana DeArmond and Eric Masterson
New Sensations (newsensations.com)
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Dana DeArmond and Eric Masterson
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Dylan Ryan and Adriana Sephora
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Dylan Ryan and Adriana Sephora
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India Summer and Anthony Rosano
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India Summer and Anthony Rosano
New Sensations (newsensations.com)
Buy "Anchorman: A XXX Parody" (store.fleshbot.com)
India Summer and Anthony Rosano
New Sensations (newsensations.com)
Buy "Anchorman: A XXX Parody" (store.fleshbot.com)
Tasha Reign and Anthony Rosano
New Sensations (newsensations.com)
Buy "Anchorman: A XXX Parody" (store.fleshbot.com)
Tasha Reign and Anthony Rosano
New Sensations (newsensations.com)
Buy "Anchorman: A XXX Parody" (store.fleshbot.com)