Sex vs. Breakup: Fitbit Edition

We already knew the Fitbit is basically porn for gym-goers, but we didn't know how many sex- and love-related applications they had until recently. I mean, we could track how long you were in the fat-burning zone the last time you hopped on a treadmill, but putting on yoga pants and getting your ass to the gym seems like more than enough. I don't know about you, but I'd way rather check out how great my last orgasm was for me and exactly when I had it—wouldn't you? 

The Good

It's exactly what one woman did back in August, when she had the brilliant idea to check on the stats from her last romp. How would it compare to real exercise? Is it better than working out? Can we, in fact, skip the gym and buying million dollar yoga pants altogether and instead turn into blissful, satiated nymphos? Well, no, it turns out. But that doesn't mean this shit isn't good for you.

The woman posted the photo of her results on Reddit under the name noveltysin. It should be noted the device started recording after 20 minutes of foreplay, considering so many dudes commented saying they wished they could get their girls off in under eight minutes, but the session is technically pretty short.  

My personal favorite part of this is where she notes her knees gave out, 'cause that's a real thing. And yes, an aftershock is a mini orgasm that happens soon after your first. Life is beautiful, isn't it? Her heart rate ultimately peaks at 123 BPM (beats per minute) and she maintains an average of 109 BPM, well into the range of "fat burning." That's badass. I would pick this over spinning any day. 

The Bad

What's the opposite of sex? I don't know, probably celibacy, but that's no fun to look at on a Fitbit. Another man, named Koby Soto, was wearing his device recently when got a very unfortunate, unexpected call: He was broken up with. He to decided to post his heart rate online, thinking "geeks" would find it entertaining. 

And while yes, it's certainly interesting, entertaining might be the wrong word. His heart rate immediately went from 72 to 88 BPMm peaking at 118 later in the day, showing signs of all-day distress. Boo. :( The Internet responded brilliantly, though, offering him tons of support 

Moral of the story: If you want to get your heart rate up, guys, have sex. Breakups are significantly less fun.