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Teagan’s Juice (Blu-Ray)

BLU-RAY

    The Movie:

    Teagan's Juice was a popular standard definition title from Digital Playground and it now makes its high definition debut thanks to the wonders of Blu-ray technology. Obviously catering to couples who are into anal and fruit (!!), does this one hold up? Not really. But here's a look:

    Scene 1 - Teagan Presley And Jerry: Once cover girl Teagan is done enjoying her drink and showing off her cute outfit, Jerry licks her pussy and then teases her ass with a metal plug. He sticks it in her back door and licks her pussy and ass for a bit and then she gives him head before he fucks her pussy, the plug still up her ass. He fucks her from the side for a bit and then pulls out to jack off onto her tits. There is NO live audio here, just music, and that takes a lot away from what would have otherwise been a decent scene. Teagan looks hot enough and the sex seems almost sincere in spots but the slow motion cinematography and lack of any dialogue whatsoever hurts this one.

    Scene 2 - Sophia Santi: Again, no live dialogue, just music. Regardless, sexy Sophia tease us by eating a banana on camera before fingering her pussy while deep throating that lucky piece of fruit. She rubs her bald beaver slowly and then fucks herself with a second banana. Nice! Too bad about the lack of live audio, however.

    Scene 3 - Teagan Presley And Erik Everhard: OK, I'm just going to go ahead and say that NONE OF THE SCENES ON THIS DVD HAVE ANY AUDIO ASIDE FROM THE CHEESY BACKGROUND MUSIC. This hurts the entire production, but there's no use crying over spilt milk. Erik uses a slice of orange to get Teagan's lovely tits aroused. He eats her out from behind while she bends over the kitchen counter before dropping to her knees and giving him head. They lie on their sides and spoon fuck for a bit and then she rides him anally reverse cowgirl so that she can play with her clit. She spins around for anal cowgirl action for a few minutes and then he fucks her missionary before pulling out and shooting his load all over her cut little belly.

    Scene 4 - Teagan Presley, Celeste Star And Charlie Laine: These three gorgeous girls take turns licking a dildo before they start going down on one another. There's some nice daisy chain action early on and everyone gets an opportunity to finger and lick everyone else, which in my mind is exactly how it should be whenever three hot girls are alone in a room spending quality time together. The dildo never really comes into play, it's all fingers and tongues and pussy here, no anal, but it looks pretty enough. Thanks ladies.

    Scene 5 - Michelle Maylene And Scott Nails: Lovely dark haired Michelle plays with a popsicle and teases Scott. Once he's in the mood and good and hard she sucks his cock nice and slowly until he decides it's time to fuck her pussy doggy style. He gets on his back and she rides him reverse cowgirl style for a while, and then she gets on her side so that he can lift her leg up for wider, deeper access. She sucks his cock and licks his balls for a bit and then he paints her face with a big gooey wad.

    Scene 6 - Teagan Presley And Codi Milo: It's bath time! These girls take turns using a sponge on each other's tits and then Codi eats Teagan out for a bit. They lather one another up and Teagan spreads Codi's cheeks and licks at her from behind while she rubs her pussy for her. She licks her ass and slips a finger up her pussy and then Codi returns the favors as Teagan sits spread eagle on the side of the hot tub.

    Scene 7 - Naomi And Scott Nails: Naomi bends over a dining room table and Scott plays with her pussy from behind, periodically rubbing what looks like passion fruit over her ass before slipping his tongue into her bad spot and licking away at her bung. She sucks his cock and licks his balls for a good while and then she bends over the table once more so that he can fuck her from behind. He shifts gears on her and fucks her ass from behind but she's obviously ok with that as soon we see her riding him anally, reverse cowgirl style. She bends over again and he pulls out and shoots his load onto the top of her shapely ass to finish the penultimate scene.

    Scene 8 - Teagan Presley And Marco Banderas: Teagan struts around in a tight red dress but soon sheds the duds and gets naked. She rubs herself and fucks herself with a red glass dildo and then we cut - she's bent over and has a bull's-eye painted on her ass cheeks. Marco moves in and licks her from behind and then slaps her cheeks around in slow motion. Booo-ooiii-iinnn-nnngggg. He fucks her doggy style and then she rides him cowgirl and then reverse cowgirl. He briefly eats her pussy and then fucks her missionary style before she takes him into her mouth and finishes him off for good.

    IF Teagan's Juice had featured a real audio track and IFTeagan's Juice hadn't bombarded us with annoying slow motion footage and irritating and completely inappropriate scene transitions, it would have been hot stuff. Unfortunately, it's riddled with those grating post production effects and it gets very old, very quickly. There's no doubt that director Celeste and director of photography Robby Dallas have captured some fantastic footage here but it's all been rendered limp by the incessant tinkering, and that's a damn shame. Teagan fans will enjoy this as she's in the bulk of the scenes but unless you're one of the dedicated, you're not missing much here. The whole feature seems fake, phony and tame and Teagan's Juice, despite the quality and the quantity of lovely ladies contained therein, comes off as a bad music video.

    The DVD

    Video:

    Teagan's Juice looks excellent in this 1080p AVC 1.85.1 anamorphic widescreen transfer but keep in mind that the picture has an intentional softness and haze to it, presumably to give it some sort of dream like fantasy effect.. There's an insane amount of detail present not only on the performers but also in the sets and backgrounds/sets used in the production. There aren't any issues at all with compression artifacts or edge enhancement while color reproduction and skin tones look excellent throughout. Eagle-eyed viewers may spot just a hint of shimmer here and there but you do have to be looking for it to notice it. There are a few scenes that have been digitally altered in post production to look like beaten up film, so don't expect these scenes to look perfect because they're not supposed to. That said, the rest of this production looks quite impressive indeed.

    Sound:

    The sole audio track on this Blu-ray release is a 48 kHz 448 kbps Dolby Digital 5.1 Surround Sound mix in English. The audio on this release is fine but it isn't as impressive as the transfer is. Dialogue stays clean and clear throughout and the levels are all properly balanced. The score sounds good and there aren't any problems with background hiss or distortion at all. The audio here won't blow you away but it certainly won't disappoint you either.

    Extras:

    The only extra of any substance is a brief Behind The Scenes (5:55) featurette that is at least presented in high definition. We get a look at some of the performers in action on the set of the production as well as some clips of the crew doing their thing. There's also some more candid material in here such as footage of the cast members relaxing between scenes and sitting around looking bored. Nothing particularly earth shattering, really, and the tendency to put 'cartoon balloons' over some of the performers is a pretty lame attempt at humor.

    Digital Playground has also included a trailer gallery featuring promo spots for Pirates, Pirates II, Island Fever 3, Jack's Teen America Mission 3, Babysitters, Island Fever 4 and Cheerleaders. The trailers are all presented in HD and in 5.1 or 5.0 Surround Sound, which is a nice touch.

    A still gallery, motion menus, Digital Playground contact info, and scene selection round out the supplements on this release.

    Final Thoughts:

    Teagan's Juice was obviously shot with quite a bit of care and attention and it features a pretty remarkable cast of gorgeous girls in all manner of deliciously precocious situations. That said, the post production effects and lack of a real audio track chop it off at the knees and the result is a pretty massive misfire. Digital Playground's Blu-ray release looks and sounds fine but the extras are as uninspired as the feature itself. Skip it.

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