THE SEX

There are good porn flicks, there are bad porn flicks, and then there are the really bad porn flicks. Security Cam Chronicles Vol. 1 is one of the worst. Why, you ask? Well, the concept here is that this is supposed to be a DVD full of hidden security cam footage of people having sex. But the problem is that this isn't hidden security cam footage...it's actors pretending to be part of hidden security cam footage!

Because the makers of this movie are trying to make their footage look like it's actually taken from a security cam, the video is poor – often in black and white or just really muted color – and each scene takes place from a single stationary angle...usually very far away from the action. There are ten segments on the disc, not one of which is remotely erotic or arousing. None of the cumshots are visible and most of the actual penetration is also hard to see.

The only good news here is that none of the performers in this title need worry about being identified by their friends or family. The picture quality is so bad that sometimes it's hard to make out the color of a girl's hair or even her ethnicity.

I've seen other adult releases "pretend" to be amateur – even though they are obviously using talent...but I don't think I've ever seen one where the makers intentionally tried to make the action unwatchable just to give it the look and feel of something amateur. Even if this were actual footage, it wouldn't be very entertaining. The fact that it is a creation of the studio makes it both unwatchable and unforgivable.

VIDEO/AUDIO

As already mentioned above, the video quality here is very poor. Some of the scenes are totally black and white, while others are barely in color – and look kind of the way a color TV program would look...back in the 1950s on a 1950 set. The audio isn't much better. It's in 2.0 Dolby, but it's scratchy and you can't really hear what's going on – assuming you want to.

THE EXTRAS

There are no extras on the DVD whatsoever...including no chapter selection or even a menu to speak of. You put the DVD in, the movie plays. When the movie ends, it just re-loops back to the beginning.

BRIAN'S BOTTOM LINE

Even with adult DVDs that I don't particularly care for, I always try to let readers know who might enjoy the disc. But in the case of Security Cam Chronicles, each and every adult viewer out there should steer clear. This is one of the worst adult releases I've seen in my several years of reviewing porn. Madness Pictures should be ashamed!