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Buffy The Vampire Slayer XXX

Adam & Eve

Genre: Parody

The Extras

Director: Lee Roy Myers

Cast: Lexi Belle, Rocco Reed, Chanel Preston, Tom Byron, Jessie Andrews, Kris Slater, Amber Rayne, Ash Hollywood, April O’Neil, Britney Amber, Michael Vegas
Non-sex roles: Anthony Rosano, Seth’s Beard

Length: 143:24 minutes

The Bonus Scene (described below)

Date of Production: 3/2012

Extras: The first extra was a non-sex version of the movie. This lasted 24:37 minutes and lacked way too much of the needed elements to work as a standalone project yet it was a nice touch (and helped give a good idea of how much sex there was without me keeping a stopwatch handy). The next extra was a 20:17 minute long Behind the Scenes feature detailing the three days (and 50 hours!) of shooting, a number of interviews incorporated into it. There were then 27:31 minutes of cast interviews, followed by a 6:19 minute long Director interview, a photogallery, trailers, spam, and a bonus scene from Deviance: D2as described below that lasted 26:51 minutes.

Condoms: None

Audio/Video Quality: Buffy The Vampire Slayer XXX was offered up in 1.78:1 anamorphic widescreen as shot by talented director Lee Roy Myers for Adam & Eve. The lighting was flatter than I would have expected for such a dark show, some scenes coming in worse than others (such as Jessie’s scene) but the competent editing and composition of the shots generally handling the material as well as a three day shoot would provide. There was an attempt to add in some contextual shots from time to time but not half what would be needed to really look right, the lack of school shots (this was designed to be post high school Buffy material), crowd shots, and other background material a factor in most porn parodies these days. Still, for a recent fuck flick parody, it was pretty decent on technical aspects, including some of Glenn’s makeup work and the set design. The audio was presented in 2.0 with a 192 Kbps bitrate, limited musical nods to the source material and nothing in the way of noticed ambient sounds to enhance the flat vocals.

Lexi Belle

Body of Review: Lee Roy Myers is acknowledged by a number of reliable sources as one of the top “go to” directors when it comes to parody porn, his latest coming out of Adam & Eve in the form of Buffy The Vampire Slayer XXX. To me, Lee has been especially good when surrounded by quality people and given the kind of budgets that just aren’t readily available as often these days, the company reportedly doing a decent job with all their directors (so I hear). The original characters for the concept came from a very campy movie that was dramatized by Joss Whedon into a very successful television series, my main exposure to it initially coming from watching the spin off series “Angel” when reviewing it (over three sittings, yeah, five years worth plus extras!) for DVD Talk. The writing was a bit uneven but it centered on a gifted young lady (Sarah Michelle Geller) who killed hordes of vampires with a team of friends in her small town. Like most vampire shows directed at a youthful audience, it was full of nonsensical relationships and token characters used to appease the ratings gods, the end result being it was actually a pretty amusing show much of the time. In this pornified version, Buffy is played by cutie Lexi Belle, Angel by Rocco Reed, Spike by Michael Vegas, Giles by Tom Byron, and Willow by Jessie Andrews. I would have loved to see Jynx Maze as Faith (her resemblance to Eliza Dushku noted many times by me) and better casting of others (Jessie just did not work for me here, and I adore her), the number of missed opportunities in the script troublesome but at least a few nods to the source material.

Chanel Preston

The back cover described the movie like this: “Buffy and her hot, horny friends are searching for bloodsuckers (and having loads of hot sex, too!). Naughty Willow casts a spell that brings the undead back to life, and in between the gang's hard-pumping action, they've got some vampire killing to do!” The press release put it this way: “Buffy and her friends are back to protecting the Valley from things that go bang in the night. After Willow accidentally casts a love potion that awakens her friends' libidos & some dark supernatural forces, the gang tries to save Giles from a pack of evil & beautiful female vampires. Will they succeed, or will they get sucked to death? Starring Lexi Belle, Jessie Andrews, Chanel Preston, Ash Hollywood, Amber Rayne, April O'Neil, Britney Amber, Rocco Reed, Kris Slater, Tom Byron, and Michael Vegas. Written by Josh Wheldon. Produced by David Lord. Directed by award-winning parody director, Lee Roy Myers.” Here’s a brief look at the scenes by cast and action, noting that no condoms were used for those still interested:

Jessie Andrews

Scene One: Lexi “Buffy” Belle, the lead hotty on the front cover, was up first in bed with Rocco “Angel” Reed. This was a dream sequence between the two star crossed lovers, the two giving some indication that they cared for each other. Myers excels in such nods much of the time (regardless of budget), their kisses leading to some light caresses and Lexi slobbing his knob like an expert (perhaps too expert for the role). They moved into a 69 from there but it wasn’t caught all that well, the active vaginal boning enough to rub loads out for some time to come thanks to their chemistry and enthusiasm. The ending facial of splooge was large and Lexi gave some post coital head, making it a decent opener but sadly, the only scene where she goes at it (weird move, huh?).

Ash Hollywood, Amber Rayne, and April O'Neil

Scene Two: Chanel Preston, a curvy babe responsible for a great many loads of genetic juice launching over recent years, was up next with Tom “Giles” Byron, the upper crust male so happy to see his lost lover that he gets right into enjoying her supernatural return. He gobbled her gash and she aggressively slobbed his knob on the brown couch, some hand to gland action applies with great eye contact. From there they vaginally screw in a variety of positions, Chanel’s ass looking best in the air but her riding abilities best displayed when she was pumping on him in cowgirl. Chanel gave some taste testing head along the way and ended his reign of riding by jerking him off all over her face with his population pudding flying everywhere, Tom taking over from her to unleash his seed.

Britney Amber with Michael

Scene Three: Jessie “Willow” Andrews, one of the cutest newcomers to porn in awhile, was up next wearing a wig, the gal being pushed to explore her desire to make out with Kris :Xander” Slater in the darkened kitchen. They kissed and her boobs came out, her lips soon wrapped around his pecker as she worked him over like a hooker on the clock. This was another time when the polished porn sex overrode the needed awkward style of sex most suited to the feature elements, her synchronized jerking off action getting him all hard for the vaginal porking of her neatly trimmed pubic patch. She was an active rider, perhaps learning these tricks at band camp or something, her yelling making me think Kris was substituted for Lexington Steele at times. They continued alternating between her blowing him and vaginal riding until he pulled out to unload his spunk all over her torso.

There were some special effects (but not many)

Scene Four: Amber Rayne, Ash Hollywood, and April O’Neil, were then up as a group of horny vampires in the prowl, feeding on the janitor before engaging in a lesbian tryst. Amber led the pack in terms of sexual energy, no surprise there, though each served as a focal point of the rug munching and fingering in an all too organized manner to work with the feature elements. They kissed, displayed highly trimmed pubes, and ate ass along the way but the trio were far from equally gifted sexually, but as much as all the bases were covered, it lacked something like a spark of passion to stand above all the usual lipstick lesbian scenes on the market today. The lack of ball batter was the least of the troubles this time, the way the scene was shot with such an emphasis on close up angles might have weakened it further.

Scene Five: Britney “Harmony” Amber, a busty blond with a great ass, was up last in bed with Michael “Spike” Vegas. They finished the sexual elements of the show with the tryst, showing a degree of enthusiasm I appreciated from them, her eye contact and his willingness to go down on her like he wanted to do so certainly helping. I liked her clean shaven slit and playfulness, Michael rimming her before she practically inhaled his pecker orally. She stroked him while looking up into his eyes, the semi-POV angle working well when used to capture the action. They then bumped uglies as he tapped that sweet pussy of hers, my only caveat being that in my fan fiction mind, the sex would have been nastier, faster, and less pornish (they would be tearing each other up, scratching, rough stuff, etc). She looked great in doggy but rode more aggressively in cowgirl, their missionary plowing leading to a healthy dose of genetic juice splashed all over her upper torso and boobs.

Bonus Scene: Deviance: D2: Teagan Presley, Nikki Benz, Jenna Haze, and Adrenalynn, were up last in a lesbian zombie scene, just in time for Halloween. Teagan was first to awaken but all of them had some seriously nasty scars, the implication that they were vampires or zombies in heat amusing given the way the camera continually panned them as they tore at their own clothing. The initial masturbation sequences by the ladies led to them pairing up for some eating out and titty play, a bunch of handily provided sex toys complimenting their fingers for some penetrative work. There was some anal and vaginal work here but a county morgue is as cock blocking to me as a church (see scene three) so all their efforts were weakened significantly. Once again, the ladies were loud to the point of being obnoxious, coming across as trying to out-yell each other, the hand wielded toys giving way to some strap on dildos.

Summary: Buffy The Vampire Slayer XXX by director Lee Roy Myers for Adam & Eve was actually better than I expected in this age of greatly diminished expectations from the parody crowd. The budget looked on the modest end by perhaps it was the assistance by folks like David Lord that helped boost this one up enough to make it worthy of being Recommended. I know darned few people buy a porno for the acting or non-sexual entertainment value but Myers delivers on both accounts enough to supplement the sexual trysts with a cast including such babes as Lexi Belle, Chanel Preston, Jessie Andrews, Amber Rayne, and other ladies while the men were better choices on average overall. In short, Buffy The Vampire Slayer XXX exceeded expectations thanks to a variety of heated sexual encounters and enough of a tribute aspect to fans of the original series to appreciate the pornification of this parody so check it out.