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Not Married With Children XXX 2

X-Play/Hustler Video

Genre: Sitcum Porn Parody

The Ladies

Director: Will Ryder

Cast: Brittany O'Connell, Jessica Bangkok, Scott Lyons, India Summer, Dino Bravo, Madelyn Marie, Eric Swiss, Kagney Linn Karter, Barrett Blade, Faye Reagan, Dane Cross
Non-sex roles: Farah Foxx, James Bartholet

Length: 130:40 minutes

The Director

Dates of Production: 3/4/2009 to 3/11/2009, 3/3/2010

Extras: There were fewer extras this time in order to accommodate the movie, the flick shot concurrently with Not Married With Children XXX 1. The only one worth noting was a 29:40 minute long Behind the Scenes feature, clips of the cast flubbing lines, having sex, or otherwise involved in making the movie all edited together for a fun look at the making of the production. There was also a photogallery, some trailers, a replay of the introductory theme song of the show.

Condoms: None

The Title

Audio/Video Quality: Not Married With Children XXX 2 was presented in the same 1.78:1 ratio anamorphic widescreen it was shot in by director Will Ryder for X-Play. Unlike any other company in porn though, this was made as a collaborative effort, Will's partner Scott David and others involved in the technical aspects enhancing it in ways the rest of the industry just hasn't been able to imitate; their efforts always centering on a single focal point (usually the director) unlike the guys at X-Play. This flick was shot concurrently with Not Married With Children XXX 1 so the technical specifications were almost identical, the MPEG-2 coding, the bitrate elevated to reach 5.8 Mbps when checked (at the probably expense of some extras), and the lighting as perfectly suited as ever. In terms of camerawork and all the visual elements, this was another solid winner too, any minor issues not impacting the production nearly as much as I've seen from the corner-cutters that abound in the industry. Suffice it to say, a lot of care went into this one and it showed time and again, the editing appearing a bit more streamlined or less noticeable for those that care. The audio was presented in 2.0 Dolby Digital English with a laugh track, the 48 kHz sampling rate and 192 Kbps aural bitrate pretty standard by now. The vocals were nicely mixed into the stereo score, the impact elevating the audio qualities such that it was observed right away, the hopeful trend being to spend more time on this aspect of production by the leaders in the field. I thought the laugh track worked better here than in some of the pretender titles out there and the timing appeared improved on the verbal queues for the jokes.

Brittany O'Connell

Body of Review: Will Ryder & Scott David set the industry on fire with their dedicated parodies released by X-Play, the ensuing rampage of followers trying to cash in on second, third and fourth rate imitations often painful to watch. The press and critics have tried to downplay the differences but ultimately, if the credits were erased, you would never doubt who was whom in this "rat race" so even though some companies howl when I say it, just focus on making a few titles better rather than chug them out on an assembly line of mediocrity. That said, the latest title by the kings of sitcum porn parodies is Not Married With Children XXX 2, the movie even more polished than Not Married With Children XXX 1 and proof positive that Will is light years ahead of the competition, the bar raised one more time as the Bundy family wins the lottery only to find that their luck remains the same. Of note here is that Kagney Linn Karter was even better this time, nearly matching the performances by Eric Swiss and Brittany O'Connell for the latest set of hardcore hijinks modeled after the hit television show. I refuse to spoil the story here but raincoaters will admire how much of the sex was strokable with great replay value, able to please fans from both sides of the genre coin in terms of entertainment value. Here's a brief look at the scenes by cast and action, noting that no condoms were used for those still interested:

Jessica Bangkok

Scene One: Brittany O'Connell, the redheaded MILF featured on the front cover, was up first as Peg, the ever-horny housewife in need of satisfaction. Since Al wouldn't give her any loving, she resorted to a large old fashioned vibrator in bed. With some lube and time, she got herself off (much to the disgust of her husband), the music more out of the 70's than anything else but it was a fun scene to warm up all the same (Kagney giving a short hummer before the plotted points continued; such as the Green Bay Packers winning by a large margin).

India Summer and Dino Bravo

Scene Two: Jessica Bangkok, a shapely Asian gal, was up next with Scott Lyons, the guy playing a friend of Bud getting a free massage by the lady at his expense. Jessica worked at the massage parlor and took care of him first, slowly rubbing him until she took off her clothing to blow him very aggressively. That led to some minimal face sitting where he serviced her and some solid cowgirl action by Jessica cranked up the heat, the young lady quite loud during the vaginal plowing. There was some chemistry and a facial finish, his genetic juice landing all over her. There was then a funny bit with Bud (well played by Dane Cross and Farrah Foxx) before more ensemble work began.

Madelyn Marie

Scene Three: India Summer, playing Marci the chicken-inspired neighbor gal, was up next with her husband Dino "Steve" Bravo, in their living room. She spread her legs on the couch but he wasn't interested, the gal getting him worked up with an active blowjob (much of it done in POV fashion). She sucked his balls and he ate her out, the two vaginally boning in a few positions showing she was totally into the ride. Some of the close up shots looked a bit tinted yellow but it was another scene showing the cast expertly handling the sexual matters as though they were a couple, Dino able to revive his good old days to bone her like a champ. The scene ended when she jerked him off into her mouth, his nut of population pudding rubbed all along her jaw line.

Kagney Linn Karter with Barrett

Scene Four: Madelyn Marie, a sexy brunette with a smoking hot body, was up next as a customer in the shoe store, Eric "Al" Swiss fantasizing about jumping her bones in the store itself. He pulled up her dress to reveal a bright blue thong nestled between her sweet ass cheeks, his fingers prodding her pussy as the juicy gal warmed up at his touch. She purred in delight as he continued his caressing assault, his tongue diving deep inside her snatch as she screamed in pleasure. While she was over the top in terms of her aural comments, her blowjob was as solid as any she has provided on camera since her arrival in the industry, the gal maintaining eye contact as she kept servicing him. As cute a lady as her doing as much of a mope as he was funny enough but she relished his pecker drilling her pussy when the time came, the intermittent oral by them between some of the vaginal positions helping make it even more visually appealing for me. It was an active ride and she had fun with it, the ending facial glistening on her face as she showed her satisfaction.

Faye Reagan

Scene Five: Kagney Linn Karter, the blond bombshell featured on the front cover, was up next as she took to the bed with aging moper Barrett Blade, the guy looking twice her age as he helped her remove her clothing and sucked her tits. Her stretch pants also showed a tiny thong underneath, the small piece of purple cloth just right for dental floss as it hugged her labia tightly. As nasty as he was, she went at him full force, sucking his boner with practiced ease and a lot of eye contact, the guy going down on her for a shorter period of time but at least showing he was not completely washed up. Kagney was again a major force to be reckoned with sexually here, her charm and sexuality such that the scene stood apart despite her working with a third tier chump. The couple then tried each other out in a series of vaginal positions, Kagney pushing back to meet his thrusts and engaging him like she was scratching a deep seated itch, milking him dry of semen that landed all across her torso.

Media Accolades

Scene Six: Faye Reagan, the cute redhead seen on the lower left hand corner of the cover, was up last as she jumped Dane "Bud" Cross on the family couch, the guy paying her for her sexual favors as she licked him all over. The fishnet top and wild animal print stretch pants she wore enhanced her figure, the underlying black bikini undies following the rest of her outfit on the floor as the horny dude excitedly pulled them off to go down on her. Faye was perfect as the pay for play hooker, not showing much chemistry for him but working to earn every last penny he shelled out. Once he had warmed her up orally, it was her turn to blow him, using some hand to gland combat as she slobbed his knob. The two then started screwing vaginally, Faye slow at first but soon getting into the action as she found him to her liking. The scene closed out by showing her take a huge blast of ball butter on her face, coating her like a donut to close things up.

Summary: Not Married With Children XXX 2 by director Will Ryder for X-Play flowed better than the award winning Not Married With Children XXX 1 and provided some great sex scenes on top of the entertaining story line. The extras were on the weak side for the company but given the strength of the movie itself raising the bar again to pummel the wannbe contenders for the title, I awarded the movie a rating of Xcritic Pick. In short, expect to see the movie and cast up for more awards this year regardless of the pretenders trying to advertise their way into the winner's spot, Not Married With Children 2 likely to be pitted against other releases by Will & Scott as the only "real" competition they will face in the genre. More extras would have been nice, though more scenes starring Kagney Linn Karter would have been even better, her slutty Kelly character always among the hottest available. India joined the ranks this time as able to stand out from the ensemble cast too, Eric the star material needed to make the movie work.