GENRE: Gonzo Feature
DIRECTOR: Seymore Butts
STARS: Mari Possa, Flower, Honey, Trinity, Vanessa, Yazmene Molan, Michelle Lay, Hershel Savage, Mark Davis, Alex Sanders, Seymore Butts
DATES OF PRODUCTION: 2004
LENGTH: 114 mins without bonus material

In our ongoing investigation into what makes the Seymore Butt's homemade gonzo films so hot, we arrive at another piece of evidence. Let's call it exhibit 4B – the inclusion of unusual material. In the past, we've discussed how finding the right performers, creating a loose and relaxed atmosphere on set, and allowing the lewdness to play out in a natural, unhurried approach add tremendously to your XXX-cstacy. But over the course of the last few reviews, we've seen the Butts' titles add a little hint of kinky spice that really seems to amplify the arousal. In Seed of Seymore, we had the famous "ass shaving" sequence. As part of a passionate pairing in American Tushy 2, Seymore inserted a banana up Darla Crane's crack, and then ate the organic sex toy when he was finished. And, of course, Seymore prides himself on offering up the squirtiest girls on the planet, which always makes for some juicy joy.

Well, we can now add another infamous moment to our pantheon of Butts perversity. There is a sequence in Finding Tushyland, the latest DVD release from the deliverer of dumper that involves Seymore stable gal Mari Possa, a series of humungous hinder helpers (read: sex toys) and a tape measure, that just has to be seen to be believed. It gives a whole new meaning to the idea of "measuring up". Along with some sensational feminine water workings from fiery fuck fem Flower and a great deal of vibrant ass play by everyone involved, this is yet another amazing title from the raconteur of the rectum. While it's not the unqualified benchmark for balling in his canon of carnality - a couple of the sequences fail to fully ignite the personal flames of fervor - this is still some of the best domestic gonzo around, made even more meaty by the addition of the atypical.

The DVD:
As with all of his works, this video diary/day in the life centers around Seymore and his persona as a porn producer/director/distributor and star. The plot is very basic: Butts carries around a camera and records the people and events surrounding him 'as they happen'. There is a very 'off the cuff' and unrehearsed feeling to the filming that adds to the air of authenticity. Unlike other offerings, there is no overriding narrative strand (going to an awards ceremony, visiting a convention) to hold Finding Tushyland in place. This is more of a scene compilation collection than most of his titles, but that doesn't totally distract from the dicking. Viewed separately, we can see which wisps of wantonness work well, and additionally, why certain erotic entries are only partially pud plying. Let's begin with:

Scene 1: Trinity, Mark Davis
Acts Performed: Cunnilingus, Anal Fingering, A to M, Blow Job, Deep Throating, 69, Cowgirl, V to M, Ball Sucking, Anal Reverse Cowgirl, Gaping, Face Fucking, Straight Anal, Anal Doggy, $hot in Mouth, Oral Cleanup, Cum Kissing

Trinity and Mark make an interesting couple – she's a lithe gal with decidedly dark looks, a long torso and small breasts. He's a beefy piece of suet who resembles a pink and puffy shaved ape, but in a good way - if that's possible. They have a conspicuous chemistry that seems to shade the sex and make it that much more malleable. Butts keeps his camera in the up close and personal mode, meaning we get a lot of overhead shots of the couple copulating and canoodling. Both performers give off a dirty, smutty vibe that's perfect for this kind of title, and it guarantees that the action is sufficiently groin girding. With lots of bottom basting and broasting on hand to heighten the humping, this is a really great start to our set. Score: 7.5 out of 10.

Scene 2: Flower, Michelle Lay, Kurt Lockwood
Acts Performed: Reverse Cowgirl, Fingering, Salad Tossing (F to M), Tit Sucking, Alternate A to M, Cunnilingus, Reverse Cowgirl, Blow Job, Scissors, Doggy, Pile Driver, Alternate V to M, Anal Pile Driver, Additional Ass Fingering, Face Sitting (M to F), Anal Spooning, Taint Kissing, Ball Action, 69, Anal Doggy, Multi-Fingered Ass Fucking, Toe Sucking, Squirting x 6, Female Love Liquid Licking, $hot in Mouth

Drop your linen and being your grinnin' as the best dang scene in quite a while makes its prurient presence known on Finding Tushyland. The crack carnal combination of the flowing Flower, the game for anything Lay and the tattooed talent of Lockwood's loins provide a threesome so heated that it threatens to melt your cathode ray tube. Starting off scorching and moving almost immediately to molten, this deep dong female fountain frenzy is about as searing as hardcore gets. Kurt appears able to pork all night, and both babes take him up on his unbelievable endurance. But once Flower starts sprinkling the living room location with all manner of pussy potion, the scene shifts into maximum overdrive. Eventually everyone ends up slicked with cunt cream and dripping with sensual sweat, and when they finish their fucking, all three performers look worn out and deeply satisfied. There is almost always a tool time tour de force on a Seymore Butts DVD, and this manic ménage is another corporeal classic. Score: 10 out of 10.

Scene 3: Vanessa, Yazmene Molan
Acts Performed: Foreplay, Vaginal Fingering, Anal Fingering, Salad Tossing, Dildo Action – Anal and Vaginal, Vibrator Action – Anal and Vaginal, Anal Probing, Vaginal Prodding, Cunnilingus, 69

It's safe to say that, in the realm of the Sapphic, no one gets the girls going better than Mr. Butts. Most gal/gal gumption is just plain pathetic, softcore shit with some plastic penetration for the sake of a stupid supposed fantasy. Few ladies look like they love getting lesbo on each other, and such a shunning almost always shines through on film. But not in Seymore's situations. Vanessa and Yazmene really lay on the homo honey glazing, and there won't be a limp lap in the house once they're done doodling in each other's personal sketchpad. The toy tenets are equally amusing (but not as much as in the scene to come...) and add a lot to the overall surge of the flippy floppy. While not up to par with other Seymore same sex scenes – mostly due to the length of the loving and the performers involved – this is still a tantalizing bit of twin twat time. Score: 6.5 out of 10.

Scene 4: Mari Possa, Seymore Butts
Acts Performed: Masturbation, Dildo Action – Anal and Vaginal, Vibrator Action – Anal and Vaginal, Double Toy Penetration, Four Finger Anal Fucking, Gape Measuring, Ass Bubble Blowing

That's right folks – GAPE MEASURING! The ability to blow ass fizz out one's fissure is truly unique – not to mention mesmerizing to watch - but to take an ever-increasing in size set of plastic and glass rods up your bunghole and then measure the resulting rupture is, well, it's just plain WEIRD. Apparently, this is something that Mari has been planning on doing for a long time, and when her personal paramour – a.k.a. Mr. Butts - refuses to help, she more or less blackmails him with booty. As he watches (and occasionally helps), Ms. Possa plows her pooper with all manner of fake phalluses, ending up with something like that looks like an electric Tylenol on steroids sticking out of her dumper doorway. Eventually, she's loose enough to get on with the gaping, and Seymore is right there to give her the Stanley slide rule results. While 2" doesn't seem like a lot, it sure looks MASSIVE on camera, and as the lens leers deeper and deeper into Ms. Possa's derriere, you'd swear you can almost make out what she had for lunch that day. So, on one hand, the autoerotic manipulation is pretty sweet. On the negative side, we get a trip up a performer's alimentary canal as a bonus. Ew! Score: 5 out of 10.

Scene 5: Honey, Alex Saunders, Hershel Savage
Acts Performed: Doggy, Blow Job, Face Fucking, Four Finger Anal Fucking, Straight Anal, Anal Reverse Cowgirl, Double Penetration in the Reverse Cowgirl Mode, $hots in Mouth

In what has to be the most derivative scene in the set – and that's saying a great deal for a Seymore Butts title – Hershel's pre-Social Security Savage-ry just does not match up well with Alex and Honey's hornswaggling. He seems like the dirty old man who happened across this piece of poon and demands an equal share. Though our bee bottom babe doesn't seem to mind his paunchy, doughy demeanor, the lack of skin elasticity in a performer can be a real turn off. All aging jokes aside, when compared to the Scene 2 trio, this man-based ballyhoo just can't match up. Even with a healthy dose of DP, and lots of fine face fucking, the level of vulgarity just can't get above basic. And since we expect more from Seymore and friends, this is one of those rare occasions when fans will feel let down instead of pumped up by the Tushy titan's sex scene. Score: 4.5 out of 10.

At 3/5ths sizzle, Finding Tushyland is still a recommended romp. But it also offers up a couple of cautionary warning signs that should provide pause for even the most ardent Butts' supporters. Scene 5 is one of the few examples in the director's catalog where the usual butt brand bonking just doesn't work out. While it seems easy to blame Savage's sagging circumstances, there may be more to it than just a few mislaid love handles. Honey also doesn't help matters much, appearing less aggressive that the standard Seymore gals. Where someone like Taylor Hayes consistently brings her "A" game to the gonzo, Hon seems hampered. Again, it could be who she's matched with, but it's possible that Butts is running out of babes who know how to hammer the high hard one with considerable skill.

Additionally, the whole Gape Measuring mini-drama is just too strange to consider exciting. While Mari Possa is to be given props for putting on quite the self-help show, the final few shots, where we actually view the first few feet of her colon, are horribly asexual. Like accidentally stumbling across a lower GI in progress, such autopsy antics in hardcore are uncalled for. While the Dirge understands a fan's obsession with the bum, too much detail is NOT a good thing. Still, those two missteps aside, Finding Tushyland is terrific XXX. Butts just has a knack for consistently delivering the delightful sex situations. Watching the couples carouse in Scenes 1 through 3, it is easy to see why he is such a popular flesh peddler. Here's hoping that the less than successful parts of Finding Tushyland don't taint his entire product line. If there is such an entity as a sure thing in porn, Seymore Butts is it. Let's hope it stays that way.

The Video:
As a handheld camera creation with very little post-production work (except for the ever more tacky title sequences), the 1.33:1 full screen image does have a few focus issues and obvious grain. Seymore sometimes shoots when available light is at a minimum and the tell tale gray specs of tanking technology are occasionally viewed. Editing is also a little suspect from time to time, but nothing so horrible as to hinder the hardcore. Still, the overall transfer is very good and even with all the POV predictability, this is a bright, colorful collection of sex scenes.

The Audio:
Utilizing the internal mic in his camera, Seymore barely captures the conversations occurring during Finding Tushyland. Sometime, the dialogue drops out. Then there are times when Mr. Butts is taking a more Q&A approach to the recording and when he does, the exchange of words comes in loud and clear. The sounds of sex are also highlighted in the Dolby Digital Stereo presentation, so we never miss a moan or misinterpret an orgasmic ovation.

The Extras:

But the best extra bit here is the added footage that can be found with just a click of your remote. During Scene 1 and 5, you can view more fuck footage by pressing the appropriate button whenever the word "bonus" appears in the lower right corner. You will then be treated to about 10 minutes of additional monkeyshines if you utilize this tool. While not better than a supplementary scene, this feature is something new for a Seymore Butts bonanza, and shows a potential for good things in the future.

Final Thoughts:
While not enough to shake the foundations of the argument, Finding Tushyland does make it difficult to champion EVERYTHING that Seymore Butts does. While he has been consistent in his output over the last few years, a couple of the scenes here show that he's as fallible as the next adult entertainer. Perfection obviously comes at a price, and if we have to have a few belly flops to see sequences as scorching as the first three here, then the invoice is well worth remitting. On the Disco Dirge Peter Meter, that marvelous scale of salaciousness, Seymore Butts' Finding Tushyland earns a respectable 6.5 out of 10 and is recommended. There is no chance at a bump up to 'highly', as there is only a 60% overall arousal factor over the five scenes, and a less than stellar set of extras on the DVD. And while it is very aggressive in its balls to bush dynamic, Butts makes some of the best gonzo for couples to commiserate over. Therefore, a Cohabitation Certification is easily awarded. Yes, the unusual and the abnormal help stimulate the sensuality and substance of Seymore Butts' homemade hardcore. But Finding Tushyland proves that, sometimes, certain edges can be pushed too far. Here's hoping our ass auteur has the common sense to corral his curiosities next time.