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Courtney Uncovered: The Courtney Stodden Sex Tape

Vivid Celebrity

Genre: Celebrity Sex Tape, Solo

Director: uncredited

Cast: Courtney Stodden

Length: 75:20 minutes

Date of Production: 2015

Extras: The first disc contained the scenes and some spam as well as Vivid’s “special offer” regarding some free porn. The second disc was the company’s celebrity sampler containing a bunch of trailers as well as two bonus scenes from past titles. The trailer portion lasted 44:20 minutes and is a familiar sight for those who have seen one of the other celebrity sex tapes in recent years, some spam added to the end of it from very old company material (with Sunny Leone, star of the Bollywood circuit in India these days), a 23:34 minute scene from the Erica Lynne show and a 30:53 minute clip from the Jessica Sierra show as well.

Condoms: None (other than bonus footage)

Audio/Video Quality: Courtney Uncovered: The Courtney Stodden Sex Tape was presented in a grainy, anamorphic widescreen as offered by Vivid Celebrity, the company not releasing any details about who shot the footage, who edited it, or how they obtained the material other than the usual claim that the starlet shot it herself, didn’t want it released since it was made for her husband, and so on. Unlike some of the better shot celebrity sex tapes, this one showed the footage as shot from a stationary camera in a hotel suite, a bold company watermark displayed continuously on the lower right corner at all times. Much of the footage was grainy or diffused courtesy of steam from the shower, the flesh tones usually fairly accurate but none of the incredibly lame night vision material earlier sex tapes often provided. The video bitrate varied substantially and there were some compression artifacts but it had the “look” of a realistically shot home video on low grade equipment, furthering the fantasy elements the series cater to. The aural components were provided in stereo, Courtney’s voice clearly heard in most cases though sometimes she ventured away from the stationary camera and was less easy to hear, the sample rate of 48 kHz at 192 Kbps ample to capture the ambient sounds of the controlled atmosphere of a hotel room.

Body of Review: Vivid Celebrity is a branch of industry leader Vivid that focuses on providing celebrity sex tapes to consumers, the hazy details of how said tapes were obtained changing from time to time. The latest release by the company is called Courtney Uncovered: The Courtney Stodden Sex Tape, the name completely unfamiliar to me when I first heard it though upon researching the name, it soon made more sense. Courtney is best known for marrying a small name actor in Hollywood (Doug Hutchison) who was in his 50’s while the gal was 16 years old, his biggest claim to fame being some minor television work and a role in a Tom Hanks movies years back called The Green Mile where he played the douche bag prison guard that liked to torture inmates.

Courtney’s parents signed off on the marriage and it inevitably fell apart as virtually everyone predicted, Courtney appearing on the talk show circuit and in minor cameos for low rated cable shows. Her level of “celebrity” status aside, the bleach blond, physically enhanced young lady from Tacoma Washington has long come across as loving attention and having daddy issues, making her prime porn material despite looking substantially older than her stated years. That said, the major sticking point for me and likely many readers is going to be how most of the 75 minute movie was tease of her putting on make up, bathing, and prancing about in skimpy lingerie before a short session of masturbation with a clear dildo; her potential to become a truly slutty porn chick obvious though not presented here in any significant manner.

The company described the show on the back cover like this: “Called the most anticipated celebrity sex tape since Kim Kardashian's blockbuster film hit the streets, Courtney Stodden's very own personal video is now yours! Watch the TV star bombshell pleasure herself in an all revealing and intimate video that was for hubby's eyes only - until now! Here's Courtney just for you, in uncut, and unedited footage in her own homemade 75 minute video where you'll see her in sexy lingerie, playing in a bubble bath, taking a hot shower, licking an ice cream cone and much more. See why the blonde sensation sets Hollywood on fire in the most controversial sex tape of the decade!” They then said this in their press release: “At 16 she caused a sensation around the world with her scandalous marriage, but that’s nothing compared to what reality TV star Courtney Stodden does in this exclusive video filmed for her hubby’s eyes only. See the 20-year old pop culture sensation at her most intimate in this never-before seen, all-revealing, uncensored Vivid Celebrity sex tape! Straight from the heart of Sin City, Courtney shows her lover just how much fun a soapy Las Vegas bubble bath can be as well as the most sensual ice cream sex ever! Voluptuous Courtney has continually spiked the ratings on hit TV shows like “Celebrity Big Brother U.K..” and "E's True Hollywood Stories". The blonde ambition makes major headlines all over the world. Daily Star coined her "The perfect pin up”. FishWrapper said: "She's got a very Marilyn Monroe thing going on, with a liberal dash of Jayne Mansfield". And even an interview with FOX News went viral when they asked Courtney the question, "What do you feel sexiest in?" and she responded: "Probably wrapped up in the bed sheets. I love my body and I'm very confident with it so I probably feel my sexiest in my birthday suit". Well here’s your chance to see the 21st century blonde bombshell totally unwrapped and uninhibited as she shows the world why she’s been called one of the sexiest realty stars ever! You’ll agree, every inch of her tight body and dangerous curves are made for pure pleasure. Here’s Courtney just for you, in uncut, and unedited footage in her own homemade tape where you’ll see why the blonde sensation sets Hollywood on fire in the most talked-about sex tape since Kim Kardashian's!” Here’s a brief look at the action, noting that no condoms were used nor were any partners present for those still interested:

The movie opened up with Courtney Stodden explaining how she spent all day on set, not going into great detail other than saying how the rest of the cast was disappointed that she bowed out to settle into her hotel suite. She changed into a frilly red dress showing a lot of cleavage before heading to the bathroom in her white lace bikini undies, her panties riding up her ass as she fixed her hair and primped, later peeling off her attire to change into a red outfit and matching satin blouse, the following bout of play showing her in yet another nighty.

This led to what is sure to become the favorite portion of the show where she ate an ice cream cone and rubbed the confection all over her body, even her bald beaver (complete with substantial labia) and boobs coated before she greedily grabbed some to stuff her face, some toppings applied to her body before she ended up taking a bubble bath. Most of her body was beneath the waterline during this portion, her tits the focal point before she ended up in the shower, the best portion of this part being obscured by steam as she masturbated.

The show then ended on a relatively high note where Courtney was in bed to masturbate for about 13 minutes after applying some lipstick and caressing herself in the nude. She picked up a clear dildo and boned herself with lots of taste testing, her ass obscured in virtually the entire segment though she gave some stripper styled moves and looked ready for some porn dude to rock her world (which never happened sadly enough). The claim that this was the most awaited sex tape since the Kardashian fiasco might well be true, there being no set standard to credibly measure such a thing (I recall many surveys where various Hollywood “A” list stars were on the top of all such lists, even a few “B” list stars, but never totally obscure types like Courtney), but she did strike me as the the kind of young lady often drawn to porn so your mileage will almost certainly vary substantially.

Summary: Courtney Uncovered: The Courtney Stodden Sex Tape by Vivid Celebrity was mostly a tease tape with a very small amount of explicit footage and some solo masturbation material of a public figure drawn to the spotlight by marrying a man over three times her age. The resulting footage from a stationary camera will not be geared to helping the usual raincoater type get off, the type of guy that likes hardcore gonzo porn where people fuck at least, Courtney remaining solo here. If this sets her up to work with some of the top talent in porn someday, that’s great but even the most optimistic view of what was included in this two disc package would be to Rent It and that would be for fans of the young lady or those totally into the celebrity sex tape genre, the vast majority of readers here unlikely to appreciate it a second time. In short, Courtney Uncovered: The Courtney Stodden Sex Tape might never be Vivid’s best selling sex tap nor their salvation given the much higher retail price but it was right in line with other recent shows in the genre so you know what to expect.