Paul Thomas's Debbie Does Dallas: The Revenge updates the classic porn film for a new generation, and the results are pretty empty-headed. It quickly devolves into a lame Bring It On riff—and later a Heathers riff—but you'll just be saying the screen, "Enough with the drama, just show us some cheerleaders having sex!" Unfortunately, the sex scenes are almost as uninspiring as the dramatic scenes. The entire movie seems slapped together out of spare scenes. And what's with the random blue arrows flashing across the screen, pointing at erect nipples. Pretty low-class, like the rest of this production. That being said, there are a couple scenes worth savoring.

The DVD also advertises multiple angles, but I saw only a couple instances, and they didn't work for me. Could be a player problem.

Scene 1

A couple gets it on outdoors after she gives him an alluring striptease. She's an attractive blonde, and he's an Italian-looking punk with an extraordinarily large prick. She practically gags on the enormous phallus but gives a spirited blow. And that's all there is. Lots of dirty talk and overacting. Grade: C+

This scene takes place in a bathroom between a football player and a cheerleader. She's a drugged-looking blonde, and he's a somewhat gross, smirking jackass. She plays with herself for a long time, then bestows a blow in front of the toilet. He returns the favor on the sink, and then he enters from behind. We also get some reverse-cowgirl and some self-conscious reflection shots through the bathroom mirror. Bathroom scenes rarely do it for me, and this is no exception. Grade: C-

This one takes place in an abandoned restaurant between one guy and two girls. This is a good scene with much energetic cunnilingus, and even a gigantic double-sided dong. I enjoyed the spirited positions in this one, but it looks like it doesn't even belong in the movie. Grade: B+

Next is a masturbation scene from one of the cheerleaders, using a gold dildo. It's a scene that feels plugged in to fill a sex-scene quota. Grade: F

In this spin-the-bottle scene, things get randy fast and build to what you think will be a fun orgy scene. But it's just a pretty good threesome scene with two girls and a guy. Grade: B-

This outdoor lesbian encounter is dimly lit (with firelight) but pretty hot. Lots of great cunny-lapping and 69 pleasure. Both blondes are extremely attractive, and their all-nude bodies are something to behold. Nice scene! I wanted it to go longer! Grade: A-

This is a weird catfight out in a muddy football field. The women start by ripping off each others' clothes and are soon all over each other. Sure, it's fun in a fantasy kinda way, but it's totally ridiculous. If it had gone on longer, I might have loved it, though. Grade: C+

This threesome between two cheerleaders and the coach takes place on a stairwell in a house. One of the women is too skinny, with ugly fake breasts, and the coach's bald head is distracting. Everyone is shaved! It's a pretty typical scene, and it lacks real energy. Grade: C-

Debbie finally does Dallas in this scene, which takes place near a merry-go-round. We get the usual positions, and I can't help but feel like it's an anticlimactic scene, since the whole movie has led up to it. Grade: C+

VIDEO/AUDIO PRESENTATION

Debbie Does Dallas: The Revenge was shot on film, so it looks a bit different from most porn flicks. Usually, shot-on-film presentations look better and more realistic than shot-on-video productions, but this transfer is so full of artifacting and other compression problems that it negates the benefits of film. Although detail is serviceable, colors are washed out and unremarkable. Lighting is uneven and inconsistent, and camera angles are sometimes disorienting.

EXTRAS

In the Positions Room, you can access scenes from the film according to type of sex. I've never seen this brand of supplement before. I must say it's pretty cool.

In Vivid Girl Extras, you can access scenes from other films by actresses in this film. Another nice extra that adds up to a lot of extra footage.

You get three extra scenes in Bonus Rooms, and one of the choices is an 8-minute peek behind the scenes of Debbie Does Dallas: The Revenge. We see some of the filming of the merry-go-round scene, as well as a selection of other scenes.

You also get a Wonderland preview, of all things!