click for trailer (while it lasts)

Not The Three Stooges XXX

Pulse Pictures/Will Ryder Productions

Genre: Parody, Comedy, Sitcums

The Extras

Director: Will Ryder

Cast: Danica Dillon, Bailey Blue, Britney Young, Mandy Armani, Chris Charming, Britney Young, Evan Stone, Cassandra Cruz, Anthony Rosano, Callie Cyprus, Dick Chibbles, Chad Diamond
Non-sex roles: James Bartholet (some rug munching only, very brief), Thomas Ward, Eric Swiss

Length: 107:01 minutes

A cute nod to the assholes at Columbia

Date of Production: 3/22/2012

Extras: Unlike a growing number of parodies in porn, there were some great extras offered up this time, starting off with a cumshot recap. This led to a 45:01 minute long Behind the Scenes feature with more additional sex than Will typically provides in such features but still giving ample interviews too. Then came two story-only versions of the movie lasting 22:18 minutes; one in color and the other in B & W. There was also a photogallery and 6:24 minutes of Bloopers (on what amounts to a Blooper Reel).

Condoms: None

Audio/Video Quality: Not The Three Stooges XXX was presented in the expected 1.78.1 anamorphic widescreen color it was shot in by director Will Ryder for Pulse Pictures under the newly formed Will Ryder Productions label. While Will has been distributed under all sorts of big name labels in the past, few companies appeared to have enough balls to take this one on given the legal heat focused on the movie by the mainstream copyright owner. As such, a nod goes out to Pulse for fading the heat on what has already been considered the biggest possible test case for the parody craze to continue. The lighting was strong and the camera work steady, the composition of the shots better in most cases than the original mainstream releases from decades ago. The bitrate varied a lot but the visual elements all provided a good pornification of the time tested classics, no one original short parodied so much as bits of several that come to mind. The editing by Mark DaWop was very much appreciated, Miles Long again showing why he is one of the best kept secrets in the industry (to the point where a former force did not even know him when he was inducted into the Hall of Fame this year). The footage was shot in 1080i using some decent equipment (you can look on the BTS to see all sorts of settings and gear if you like), the potential for an upgraded high definition version probably unlikely but welcome if at all possible. The audio was presented in 2.0 Dolby Digital English using 192 Kbps. The vocals were crisp and the music close enough to the original that it invoked many fond memories, serving the production nicely to enhance the street credibility it offered.

Danica Dillon, Bailey Blue, and Britney Young

Body of Review: Will Ryder is world renowned as the man most responsible for jumpstarting the porn parody craze a number of years back, everyone in the industry owing the man a debt of gratitude. While his efforts have been among the very best in a now crowded field, he now has a release under the Pulse Pictures banner using the newly commissioned “Will Ryder Productions” label. The title is called Not The Three Stooges XXX, a tribute to the time tested comedic classics virtually everyone in the world has seen given their extensive release in syndication over the last 75 years. If you’re new to this planet, the Three Stooges were a brainless trio of men always looking for work but proving so inept at all they did, they ended up screwing up everything they touched. Led by angry “Moe”, bald knucklehead “Curly” and wild haired “Larry” poked fun at societal norms, injustices, and even politics in short films presented in addition to a regular movie. While they starred in various movies as well (typically using a variety of replacements for Curly since he passed away much earlier than the other two), the Stooges became most popular when the fledgling television market endlessly replayed their exploits which are shown all over the world even now as some of the best physical comedy from a time when it was okay to laugh at such things.

Mandy Armani (formerly known as Casi James)

Rather than parody a single short of the comedy group, director Will Ryder instead went for the broader picture this time, opening up the door for numerous sequels should all the mounting legal troubles work out (the public trailer was stopped by threats of lawsuits, the coverage in mainstream media more than anything I have seen in the porn world; not surprising given the stakes involved). As always, the Stooges look for work, fuck everything up at every turn, and thanks to the pornification of the material, two of them get to fuck some babes, the third getting a short oral sample of snatch but nothing of consequence. The rumors of this being well worth award attention for just about every parody category out there seem to be true, if for no other reason, it would be a big “Fuck You” to Hollywood for trying to silence a popular director in a genre that has sustained the industry of late. That said, folks into younger, hotter newcomers will already know that Will Ryder always manages to come through for the fans, a few of the more notable additions to his repertoire this time including Bailey Blue, Britney Young, Mandy Armani, and Callie Cypress (though Danica Dillon and Cassandra Cruz were fuckable too). The back cover described the movie like this: “The storyline could be mistaken for one of the old Three Stooges Columbia Pictures famous shorts that played in movie theaters back in the late 1930s. The stooges are unemployed so their girlfriends refuse to have sex with them until they find jobs. Desperately horny, they try anything to find work and end up in wild sexual situations with gorgeous girls. The story and look of the movie is a picture-perfect parody of The Three Stooges but the orgy definitely was not. Director-of-the-Year Will Ryder delivers an AVN award-contender that will thrill fans worldwide!” Here’s a brief look at the scenes by cast and action, noting that no condoms were used for those still interested:

Britney Young with Evan

Scene One: Danica Dillon, Bailey Blue, and Britney Young were up first in a very short solo masturbation sequence where they openly displayed their snatches to motivate the guys into why they were really interested in finding work, eating taking a backseat to all men’s real motivation in life. The ladies were dressed in suitable clothing with suitable hairstyles, lifting their dresses to display the goods as they rubbed one out. James/Curly’s reaction was amusing to say the least, his role sure to be up for awards of all sorts.

Cassandra Cruz

Scene Two: Mandy “Casi James” Armani, the sexy blond seen on the lower left corner of the front cover, was up next with barber Chris Charming. She sat in his chair and aggressively slobbed his knob, working the shaft with her hand as her lips wrapped around that baseball bat he calls a pecker. There was some POV footage included and he went right to pounding her well coiffed snatch, her moans coming across as indicative of her having fun as she continued to look up at him as though he were giving her some food for thought. Personally, I liked seeing her shapely ass in the air when they did it doggy style even more, her cowgirl positions at least allowing her to be an active vaginal rider. He finished up by tossing out a wad of genetic juice to her face, Mandy licking some of it up for taste testing purposes.

Larry (Evan Stone), Moe (Anthony Rosano), and Curly (James Bartholet)

Scene Three: Britney Young, a very sexy blond with pretty eyes and a slutty look to her (an appropriate look given the scene parameters), was up next as a nude model working with Evan “Larry Fine” Stone. Given the financial stakes in their tryst, Larry was set loose on the lovely young babe, feeling her breasts up before she dropped to her knees to slob his knob like a seasoned professional. Her hand to gland skills were a bit less polished than Mandy’s in the last scene but she was no stranger to using her tongue and eye contact to enhance the mood, Evan responding like any sensible man would by being fully erect and ready to hammer her snatch silly. There was some POV footage here too, a staple of the director from what I’ve seen over the years, Evan gobbling her gash as she leaned back on the school desk to receive his oral charms. She was another lady that looked great in doggy, her rounded rump begging to be taken though the scene only called for vaginal penetration only. Her dripping wet pussy impaled itself on his pecker in cowgirl positions to soon unload his wealth of population pudding all over her face.

The Orgy

Scene Four: Cassandra Cruz, a sexy Latina in maid outfit, was up next as she provided some free maid services to Anthony “Moe Howard” Rosano, his characterization of the infamous man nearly as good as James’ Curly or Evan’s Larry. James helped by removing her panties and getting a quick snack but he was tossed out as Cassandra and Anthony kissed. That led to Anthony eating her out while she cried in pleasure, her own messy hummer getting him ready to pound her pussy crazy. She jerked him off and licked his balls a bunch in bed, some active vaginal riding leading to the expected facial of spunk glazing her face nicely. In a side note, his scowl disappeared briefly when he launched his load, a common belief regarding the character in the mainstream shorts being his lack of sex caused him to act like a Columbia Pictures asshat lawyer.

More Orgy

Scene Five: Danica Dillon, Bailey Blue, Britney Young, Mandy Armani, Callie Cyprus, Dick Chibbles, Evan Stone, Anthony Rosano, and Chad Diamond were up next as they engaged in an orgy. The guys were making a delivery and discovered the truth about their girlfriends, the limited storyline about plumbing causing James to end up in the basement with Thomas Ward (as the butler) to fix the pipes while the rest of the cast ended up cleaning each other’s pipes orally and vaginally. There was a lot going on for a few cameras to capture perfectly, an attribute of many other orgies I’ve watched, but the devotion to blowjobs, rug munching, and various forms of vaginal engagement were really fun to watch (giving the scene a lot of additional replay value). Suffice it to say that some of the ladies were better sexually than others but every one of them was worth a load or three of splooge, the ball batter freely flying in the sex club as faces, abdomens, and breasts were given some liquid loving.

Still More Orgy

Summary: Not The Three Stooges XXX by director Will Ryder for Pulse Pictures covered a lot of territory sexually but it was the portrayal of the situations and characterizations by the trio of leads that sold it so well. Given the time it was shot and the release date, I knew the amount of polishing up was minimal so it was likely a tightly shot production, making the resulting parody even more amazing. Sexually, it contained a bunch of very attractive young babes, Will wisely leaving most of the talking to the men this time, and the feature elements scored big time thanks to Evan Stone, James Bartholet, and Anthony Rosano giving solid performances so I rated it as Highly Recommended though this should be considered a “must have” feature for anyone that appreciates porn parodies and/or the popular comedic trio from so long ago. There is also a chance that legal action will remove this one from the marketplace so pick up a copy before it disappears (yes, that has happened before), the hope for a court win and subsequent sequels just too great to dismiss in my book. In short, Not The Three Stooges XXX may not have had as big a budget as some of the upcoming parody blockbusters but it terms of fun factor, hot young chicks, and enough chutzpah to potentially earn Will Ryder a Sturman award given the legal battles taking place, it is definitely a contender.