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Let Me Clarify, It’s my choice

XCRITIC

I've heard it all lately about why I chose to shoot BG. My boyfriend forced me into it, I have low self-esteem, daddy issues, I was running out of money, I couldn't cut it as a fetish model or a GG solo model. These are none of the reasons. None of them at all. Shooting BG was my choice and my choice, alone. Almost everyone I know says they expected me to do it at some point or another, I didn't expect it.

I started off shooting art modeling photos. I progressed into softcore glamour work and fetish modeling. After that, I went to solo and GG work. Finally, I got bored and said what the hell, the next step should be BG. I figured at that point in my career, it just seemed natural. I love girls and doing girls, but I kept hearing how I would love BG and how much my friends liked shooting it. I'm one of those girls who thinks things through from all aspects and I did just that. I thought, ok I can't do certain things after this, but I never wanted to do those things anyways, so what could it hurt to try it? If I hate it, I learned that, and can never do it again. It turned out I really liked it. I still really like it. I love my job. I enjoy going to work, to the gym, camming, and whatever else comes with this job.

I was not a person who changed her limits because she wasn't working as a model or failed at having real jobs. I've worked high paying office jobs, I worked as a patent researcher for summers on end. It wasn't for me. Traveling around making pennies for such hard work as a fetish model was not for me. Neither was shooting for random guys off Model Mayhem and never having any say in what craptacular photos were put out of me. I still cringe at some of what I see that is out there of girls or of me. I could have done whatever I wanted. I chose to naturally progress into BG. It was my choice. It was not a last choice or a means to an end. It was a curiosity that I felt the need to explore. 

I'm glad I explored it. I love going to work. I love the people I meet and work with. I'm very confident in my choice and my life where it's at now. I actually couldn't be happier most of the time, with the exception of being a 24 year old and occasionally getting down on myself or life, like regular people do. So, let me be clear, this was my choice, it is my body, and I will continue to do what I want with my life for the rest of it. I will never bend my own rules or comforts because I failed at something or was pressured. It will always be my choice and mine alone.


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