Pirates, Catherine and The New Devil in Miss Jones

While summer is the big time for mainstream Hollywood releases, the fall is always special for fans of adult films. Because of the AVN Award deadline that looms at the end of each September, porn studios scramble to get their best titles out to be considered for nominations. In this very special edition of The Blue Room, we're going to let all our readers know which movies to keep your eye out for, and what to expect from each.

Boasting over 300 special effects shots and featuring a cast of some of the sexiest women in all of adult, Pirates is the must-see, must-own, DVD release of 2005. It's so big that it took two adult powerhouses - Digital Playground and Adam & Eve - teaming up just to get the movie shot. Starring such beautiful blondes as Jesse Jane, Carmen Luvana, Janine, Teagan Presley and Devon, Pirates promises to be an old-fashioned swashbuckling romp - and the DVD extras should be just as much fun.

For the first time, Digital Playground is not only releasing a high definition Windows Media version of the film (for viewing in HD on your computer), but they are also doing the same thing with the behind the scenes featurette. Of course, those whose computers just aren't fast enough to meet the demands of the Windows Media version can rest assured knowing that a standard DVD of the movie is also included in the 3-disc package. The remaining DVD is loaded with bonus features, including an audio commentary track; the standard version of the behind the scenes footage; a look at the creation of the special effects; trailers; bios; bloopers; and much more!

One of the biggest "buzzes" in the adult world this fall has been over the upcoming release of Michael Ninn's Catherine - which should be available (or be very close to being) by the time you read this. I was one of the few who got an early look at this near-masterpiece, and if you're a fan of the "porn as art" genre, Catherine may be the best of the lot so far.

Starring sexy redhead Audrey Hollander - who is currently the undisputed "anal queen" of adult - thanks to her passion for doing it in almost every single scene she's in - Catherine tells the story of a young woman who is struggling against strange visions that are going on in her mind. Is it a past life? Multiple personality? Or is she just crazy? Ninn leaves that up to the viewer - but it's a wild ride, very much in the tradition of David Lynch and other well-known cinematic surrealists.

Catherine is actually being released on DVD in two versions. A slightly cheaper single disc version with basically only the movie, and a full-blown two-disc version with a ton of bonus features - including several bonus scenes. Trust me on this one: fork over the extra cash for the 2-disc version, you'll be happy you did!

What could be bigger than a release by Jenna Jameson? Well, how about two releases by Jenna? That's right, the most popular pornstar in the world has two big titles coming out in a very short space of time. The "lesser" of the two (if that's even a proper description) is Jenna Loves Pain, an all-girl movie and Jenna's first foray into the world of hardcore bondage. Then there's the massive 3-disc DVD release of The New Devil In Miss Jones, Jenna's remake of the classic porn movie which includes commentary from Jenna and most of the starring cast, as well as your own DVD copy of the original Devil In Miss Jones!

A few years back, director Nic Andrews all but swept the AVN Awards with the original vampire thriller Dark Angels. Now, Andrews is revisiting his vampire chronicles in Dark Angels 2, a Digital Sin release that should rank right up there with the best adult features ever made.

This time around, Andrews has hired newcomer Sunny Lane in the lead role, and has brought on both Evan Stone (reprising his character from the original) and Barrett Blade as a pair of blood-sucking vamps. Andrews is known for his attention and passion for visuals, and if the trailer is any indication - fans of the first movie will be in for a real treat with this sequel.

Finally, no one who has enjoyed director Jonathan Morgan's previous titles such as Space Nuts and Hercules will want to miss his upcoming comedy that parodies slasher flicks: Camp Cuddly Pines Powertool Massacre. Starring Wicked Girls Stormy, Jessica Drake and Keri Sable; and featuring other girls like Katja Kassin, Rita Faltoyano and cute newcomer Kinzie Kenner, Cuddly Pines promises to be one of the few adult releases this fall that will get you off and have you howling with laughter at the same time.

The specs on the DVD version of Cuddly Pines were not yet available as this column went to press, but expect Wicked to pull out all the stops when it comes to bonus material - as they have with most of their previous big releases.

The only downside of all these releases is figuring out which one to buy...since they all sound great! But do what I do - set aside this month's "escort fund" and invest in some porn titles instead! Was that out loud? No one heard that, right? Bueller? Bueller?

Keep those cards, letters and naked pictures of your girlfriends coming to
[email protected]. Plus, keep your eye on X Critic's Adult Reviews section, where you should see complete reviews of these (and many more) DVDs as soon as they become available!

- Brian Nicholson

All The DVDs mentioned in this column can be purchased at AdultDVDEmpire.com - X Critic's Exclusive Adult DVD Store.