What The Fuck Is A Balldo?

Okay, so many of you might know the new sex toy that's sweeping the nation. Well, not exactly sweeping the nation but it has accumulated a bit of buzz for it's, um, uniqueness.

So, put the words together and then you'll have what this gizmo is. BALLS. DILDO. There you have it. The Balldo. Now you're thinking, "how the fuck would I put my BALLS in a dildo?" Well, the folks at Balldo have figured that out and basically, it's a silicone, bullet shaped dildo with the sides of it cut out with a ring at the top. Lube your balls, plop them into the shaft, then let the ring sit on the top against your body. In order to keep your balls tight in it (and prevent that nasty ball slippage while you're fucking with it), you can add additional rings which they won't tell you are actually BALL STRETCHERS (any kinkster will know that right away). I know plenty of guys with grape sized balls that it wouldn't fit and I know plenty of guys whose balls are the size of tennis balls so apparently, one size will NOT fit all.

The company says that guys' balls have 6,000 nerve endings in them. I know when you kick them, or bust them (one of them sometimes unintentionally and the other, well, when guys LIKE that sensation), sure, you can feel them. But I find it hard to believe that they chose that number of nerve endings which is the SAME number of nerves scientists say are in a woman's clitoris. COINCIDENCE? I think not. More like guys are crying for gender equality, even in the sack, because they're jealous women own clitorises and they don't. I think guys have two nerve endings in their balls: the pleasure nerve and the pain nerve. Done.

Back to the Balldo. Now your balls become part of the dildo. Since I am not a dick owner, or balls owner for that matter (although I've been told I have plenty of them), I can't imagine what this feels like, never mind try to use it. Think of the physics: your dick is there, then you have this THING hanging between your legs with your balls snugly inside. What does it do? HANG THERE? I mean, your balls don't have any erectile tissue so ya just lay back and let the receiver figure out what to do with your boner getting in the way of trying to fuck your balls? Do you dare attempt to DP with your cock and your misplaced balls? I have no fucking idea. I just know I would laugh my ass off at the opportunity of seeing a Balldo in action.

Speaking of fucking, if I knew someone who wanted to try this, I'd probably give it a go to be on the receiving end of it although I don't practice yoga and have a pretty tight snatch so I have no idea how it would actually work.

Let me know if you get a chance to slip your balls into a Balldo. Send pictures. I need a good laugh (at the Balldo - not your balls). Thanks!