Fridays with Roy: Talking Dirty

AVN Hall of Fame director Roy Karch hasn't let the necessity of the porn formula get in the way of his righteous indignation when someone appears to be—shocking!—"faking it" on camera. "Don't start screaming when the cock isn't even in you yet, sweetie," he says.

Read more of Mr. Karch's penetrating wisdom after the gap. - G. Ponante

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"Just talk dirty for a minute," Karch instructed an actress on the set of a recent movie. Karch directs for SexZ Pictures (whose upcoming releases pictured here) and Adam & Eve, among others.

"Do you like that? Do you like that?" She offered.

"I think it's pretty obvious he likes it," Karch snapped. "He's up there, isn't he?"

Karch does not have rose-tinted glasses on. He knows the way things are. Perhaps this might be the second scene the actress is doing today. Perhaps the third or fourth. Maybe she—the horror!—just isn't that into it. Karch tries to give her a line reading. Though verboten in Hollywood, now that I am a famous director myself I know that line readings are a helpful and welcome tool in the Porno-American community.

"Just say, 'Fuck me,'" he suggests.

"Fuck me!" she screams.

"No, no, no," Karch says. "You don't want to make him recoil. Make him lean in so he can hear you."

"Fuck me," she whispers.

"Beautiful," Karch says. "It's easy to forget that there are actually people paying for this stuff."

Note: both Mika Tan and Lauren Kain (pictured) know how to talk dirty.

· Roy Karch (roykarch.com)
· Sex Z Pictures (sexzpictures.com)

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Previously: Porn Valley Dispatch Archive