· If you've got something to sell, all you need to do is slap a soccer ball and a flag on it and you're in patriotic, sports-crazed business for the World Cup. See how a little red cross turns a boring old vibrator into the Victory Vibe? Hopefully, it finds the goal more often than some of those teams will. (lovehoney.co.uk)
· If jingoistic vibrators aren't your thing, can we interest you in an anatomically correct weenie roaster instead? Come on. You know you want it. (Gizmodo)
· It was a slow week for celebrity swimsuit photos (will summer ever arrive?) but we'll settle for these Christina Ricci poolside pics, mostly because we never realized she was such a fan of the ink. Or has she simply been hazed? (wwtdd.com)
· How do you turn a rap video from an obscure South Florida record label into one of the biggest hits in YouTube's history? A good beat, a catchy hook and, oh yeah ... about three million email addresses collected by the owners' network of porn and dating sites. See, not every spam message has to be about your penis! (youtube.com + nytimes.com; registration required)
· A conservative student newspaper was banned from Johns Hopkins University after criticizing the school for paying for famed porn director Chi Chi LaRue to speak on campus. Hey, we're all for promoting the super-secret-radically-evil porn agenda (whatever the hell that might be) but free speech is free speech, right? (xbix.com)
· AVN has now joined MySpace, although we think they may be lying about their age. Won't someone think of the children! (And yes, before you ask: We're working on it.) (myspace.com)
· Everything is more expensive in Manhattan, but just like designer handbags and suits you can find discounts on fake boobs and nose jobs at the world's largest outlet mall, a.k.a. Long Island. Same quality, lower prices, but stay away from the "I Can't Believe It's Not Botox!" (longislandpress.com)
· What could be more filthy than this Charmin commercial? Why, this ABC news headline: "No More Bear Meat In Glory Hole". (And if you don't know what we're talking about ... well, maybe you need to get out more.) (vividblurry.com + abclocal.go.com - thanks Jason)
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Previously: Morning Wood Archives/Wet Spots Archives