Wet Spots

· This just in: the Department of Homeland Security has raised the Lindsay Lohan Fake Boob Alert Level to "Orange." If this were an actual emergency, you could hide under her rack. (Defamer)

· Playboy overhears something about a soccer tournament and arrives to the party a day late. (Hey, they only had a month!) We said we were done talking about football, but boobies is boobies. (fuckingmotherfucker.com)

· We've seen pictures of Albert Einstein and even by the standards of theoretical physics professors, he was pretty goofy looking. So how did he manage to pull down six different girlfriends? Were they relativity groupies? (reuters.com)

· Remember Stacey Dash, the girl who played Alicia Silverstone's cute best friend from the movie "Clueless"? Well, this is what she looks like 10 years older and naked. Better late then never, we always say. (dailyniner.com)

· A film featuring hardcore sex scenes will debut at the Tate Modern gallery in London this fall. How do you know it's art and not porn? Because it's in a museum silly. (independent.co.uk)

· We confess that can't figure out this ad. Are they trying to sell socks to stuff in your pants, oversized underwear to cover your enormous johnson, or convince insecure men to join a gym? All we know is $7 for a pair of tube socks is a fucking rip-off. (copyranter.blogspot.com)

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Previously: Morning Wood Archives/Wet Spots Archives