Wet Spots

· There are sports fans, and then there are people who really love sports. Some guys—like the one standing next to the cheerleader with the broken arm—make it easy to tell the difference. (Deadspin)

· While some might be shocked that Charlotte Church beat Kate Moss in a poll to determine the best celebrity figures, we think it all comes down to a matter of taste. Like, for example, deciding whether to have a couple of scoops of extra-rich vanilla ice cream versus two Tic Tacs for dessert. (hollywoodtuna.com + contactmusic.com)

· A reverend in Texas has condemned the Simpson sisters with the worst curse of all: saggy boobs. Even "The Dukes of Hazzard" wasn't that horrible a sin. (thesun.co.uk)

· We're disgusted that someone would ride his motorcycle through town wearing nothing but a football helmet. That's a such a clear violation of head safety laws. (570news.com)

· Innocent clubgoers in Las Vegas continue to be terrorized by the dreaded Paris Hilton assflap. Won't someone please think of the children? (Or at least anyone standing within eyeshot of Paris Hilton in clubs in Las Vegas.) (Defamer)

· Pity poor young men who find that all is not what it seems once the bra comes off. Life is full disappointments and sometimes you just have to learn that the hard way. (story w/Paris Hilton boob slideshow @ sky.com)

· A man in Iowa has to pay $14,000 (!) to his old neighbor for sitting in his house and staring at her ... naked. When did being creepy get so expensive? (whotv.com)

· Step One: Add a live web camera function to Xbox online gaming. Step Two: Find a way to block unwanted live web camera porn while playing Xbox games online. Is there anyone who didn't see that coming? (gamerscoreblog.com, via Kotaku)

· Today's Eastern European news story that sounds dubious but which we desperately wish was true: a Bulgarian woman's breast implants act as an airbag and save her life in a car crash. Er, it could happen! (iol.co.za)

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Previously: Morning Wood Archives/Wet Spots Archives