Nipples Motivate You To Buy Clothing

We really wish we understood the deep-rooted, possibly genetic but most certainly childhood-generated cause of this phenomenon. We bet Freud would have something interesting to say about it, but we hate that guy. Jacques Lacan, how do you feel about leopard print and titties?

He's dead? Crap. We're too lazy to ask Zizek. Uh, we'll just say it has something to do with empathy, the want to clothe a woman we're so attracted to/the need to impress this naked girl by giving her nice things. All we know is that if we ever see this stuff on sale—whether it's on a mannequin or a hanger—we automatically recall the nipple and our debit cards fly out of our hands.

· Via In The Raw (itr2010.org)