Are Women Using “Counterfeit Racks” To Be The “Breast In Class”?

Hold up, let's get our terminology straight. On the one hand, we think it's demeaning to have artificially enhanced breasts called "counterfeit." On the other hand, it sounds really cool to call them that. It's like they're illegal or something badass!

Why are Jules Jordan and Jenna Haze labeling fake breasts as counterfeit? Does the U.S. Treasury have to step in and arrest these talented ladies for bumping up their busts? It's a victimless crime, people. In fact, we think the pornstars of "Breast In Class 2" deserve rewards for so generously providing larger surfaces upon which we may rest our weary eyes. We swear we'll try to get better at eye contact, but times like these, it's not happening.

When Kagney Linn Karter comes around, she knows that people are automatically drawn to the awesome orbs sticking out of her chest, and she tries to keep them front and center at all times. She enjoys climbing atop Mick's massive cock and riding his ass into the ground, but she has to be mindful of her nipples, making sure they remain equidistant from Mick's penis, on either side of central vertical plane. When it's time for the cumshot, Kagney dribbles everything out of her mouth and onto her mammaries because she knows that we're like horny tyrannosaurs: we don't see anything unless it moves past the breasts.

We know that Jenna Haze is the director and everything, but how come she gets to be in the movie as well? Maybe she's a mole, learning the secrets of the artificially-enhanced and feeding them to her natural breasted superiors. Katsuni and Manuel Ferrara interrogate her with a leather-heavy threesome. Jenna figures it'll be enough to worship Katsuni's tits and move on, but Katsuni keeps her on a leash and pulls her toward Manuel's dick. Could Manuel be sporting a counterfeit cock? What other secrets will Jenna learn by sitting on Katsuni's face?

We're used to thinking of fake tits as just that: fake tits. They're supposed to be surgically constructed imitations of naturally large breasts and nothing more. But you know what? No one ever calls tattoos fake birthmarks; they're just tattoos. We think fake breasts can be their own thing, independent items of anatomical interest, with no prejudices held against them. They're big, bouncy, sometimes shelf-like, and most importantly, they're attached to some of our favorite performers. Thanks for showing us the light, Jules Jordan.

· Jules Jordan (julesjordan.com)
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