Can Coco’s Wily Areolae Ever Be Contained?

Nicole "Coco" Austin's latest bikini is made from a cat's footsteps, the beard of a woman, the roots of a mountain, the sinews of a bear, the breath of a fish, and the spittle of a bird, and it still can't keep her areola from popping out.

The Norse mythology-based bikini was her first line of defense, and the big hat and sunglasses were her second line. Coco figured she could play a game of "Where In the World Is Nicole Austin's Areola?" but it's hard looking like Carmen Sandiego when you're at the beach. That girl wears a big red trenchcoat!

· Taxi Driver Movie (taxidrivermovie.com)