Tell Us About Your Mother, Valerie Kay

Sometimes we can unearth a nugget of real human truth even in improvised dialogue on the set of movies in which "schoolgirls" fuck their "teachers." Marc Anthony, take heed.

In Joey Silvera's "The Teacher's Pet 3," five women explain why they must have a private meeting with their teacher. But here's what they don't explain:

1. Why are they dressed so sluttily? Slutwalk or no Slutwalk, practicality if not decorum would suggest you don't dress for landscaping class like that.
2. Why do five different teachers appear to share the same house?

Anyway, Valerie Kay is told she needs to have a special "workout" at the home of her gym teacher, Alan Stafford. Fair enough, but then she seems to go off script.

"I'm Hispanic," she says, "and I told my mother that [the teacher] looks like Marc Anthony, and then she says, 'Well, if he looks like Marc Anthony, you should go over his house.'"

Readers, I think you will agree that the central point here is that Kay was expressing to her mother her reservations and concern that she was being invited alone to her male teacher's house, only to be told that she should go since her teacher looked like the dreamy former husband of Jennifer Lopez.

I found this odd, but now I know who told her to dress so slutty.

· Evil Angel (evilangel.com)
· Buy "The Teacher's Pet 3" (aebn.net)