Someone’s Colon Is Ready for Its Closeup, Mr. Stagliano, And Other Pornic Wonders

"I wish my pussy was fatter, like my butt," says Kristina Rose in "Buttman: Focused," a porn compendium like every dirty National Geographic rolled into one. "That way my front butt would match my back butt."

Some porn movies endeavor to create something larger than the sum of their parts. This is usually where they fail. But "Focused" stresses that the Parts The Thing.

You can't help but recall that summer when you learned that wonders exist beyond those Parental Controls on the computer and in that secret DVD stash, when you went searching for specific things rather than whole people.

Thus director John Stagliano focuses on wedgies, camel toes, twisted nipples, feet, pussy closeups, butt-sniffing, and many other specific fetishes that might flash by in another movie—in transition from one position to another, for example, or in a backstage video—and lingers there.

"That thing hurts when it hits you, man," says Aiden Starr, doing just that to a thrumming Hitachi Magic Wand against the clothespinned nipples of Dana DeArmond, who groans.

The movie is like a porn equivalent of turning on the microwave to watch an egg explode, and other very specific satisfactions.

Or we can look at a clinically-close-up vagina like it's one end of a time portal.

Watching the camera zoom in on Velicity Von's gaping urethra reminds us of the time with the Inappropriate Babysitter when we were at pre-"Barely Legal" status. It makes for a contemplative moment when we realize we have no intention of looking away now, either.

· Evil Angel (evilangel.com)
· Buy "Buttman: Focused" (aebn.net)