Hail “Underbelly,” Full Of Gracie Gilbert’s Wanton Masturbation

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Obviously we respect Gracie Gilbert's need to touch herself--how could we not?--but using self-love to torture a nun like this isn't just disrespectful, it's an abomination of masturbation! That's not what DIY screwing is about, Gracie.

Of course, if we were actually in a position to scold Ms. Ida Pender here for her actions, we'd be silenced by her blimp breasts and hanging on every self-made moan she let out. We bet the nuns feel the same way too. It's not easy dealing with a dynamo like this.

· "Underbelly: Squizzy" (channelnine.msn.com)