A Field Guide to Amy Schumer

Hot, curvy blonde comedienne Amy Schumer hosted the MTV Movie Awards last week and she served up the right amount of filth and fun.  She joked about her vagina, made out with Amber Rose on the event's Kiss Cam and even got a veggie tray thrown at her by J.K. Simmons as part of a joke about his role as the abusive music instructor in the compelling film "Whiplash".  

 Schumer grew up on the Upper East Side of Manhattan and was voted "Class Clown" and "Teacher's Worst Nightmare" in her high school yearbook.  She went on and got a four year degree in theater from Towson University in Maryland.  She came back to New York City after that and did what many wannabe actors end up doing--she waited tables and tended bar while taking more acting classes.  She started doing stand-up comedy in the summer of 2004 when she first performed at Gotham Comedy Club. She got chosen to record a "Live at Gotham" episode for Comedy Central later that same year.  From there, she auditioned for the show Last Comic Standing and didn't pass the audition.  The following year, she made it on the show and made it all the way to the show's finale where she placed fourth overall.  Not bad for a chick who had only been doing standup comedy for two years, right?  She was also runner-up on the 2008 comedy reality competition show Reality Bites Back hosted by Michael Ian Black.

She did an ad campaign for Butterfinger (yum!) and has appeared on a ton of TV shows including NBC's 30 Rock, Adult Swim's Delocated where she played Bob's Burgers' star Eugene Mirman's girlfriend, FX's Louie and HBO's Curb Your Enthusiasm and Girls, where she plays an aggressive friend of Adam Driver's annoyingly innocent then-girlfriend.  She acted in three films in 2012: the independent comedy "Price Check" where she starred with Parker Posey at the film which premiered at the Sundance Film festival, the comedy-drama "Seeking A Friend For The End of the World which starred Keira Knightley where she played the woman who dumps Steve Carell because the world is ending, and the independent comedy "Sleepwalk with Me", which starred comedian Mike Birbiglia.  (I seriously can not recommend the movie "Seeking A Friend For The End of the World" enough. If you take one thing from this piece, go rent that now.)  

Schumer is the creator, star, writer and executive producer of the Emmy-nominated Inside Amy Schumer Comedy Central television series which premiered in April 2013 to the network’s highest season premiere ratings of the year, which is a pretty impressive thing for the network which also has The Daily Show with Jon Stewart and South Park.  The third season of it premieres on April 21st.  

Yeah, sitting next to Chrissy Teigen on TV is really something no woman should never have to do.  I love the application of Chapstick at the last minute, because that is going to help or something.  Schumer has also been on two Comedy Central roasts--the roast of Roseanne Barr and the roast of Charlie Sheen.  Schumer’s one-hour stand-up special, Mostly Sex Stuff, became Comedy Central’s second-highest rated special in 2012. 

This past summer Schumer completed production on the movie Trainwreck that Schumer wrote and stars in alongside Bill Hader, Tilda Swinton and Brie Larson. Judd Apatow produced and directed the feature film that is scheduled to be released in July 2015.  I really can not wait to see it.  Her Comedy Central Presents special is hilarious and one of the top-rated specials from that series.  

Her album Cutting placed in the top five of the Billboard Charts and was included on multiple Best Comedy Albums of the Year awards’ lists. She co-hosted Hoppus on Music with Mark Hoppus of Blink 182 on Fuse and has appeared at the Montreal Comedy Festival for the last five of them.  She still, with all of that stuff going on in her world and life, finds time to tour doing standup and regularly tours throughout the United States.  

Yeah, peanut butter does NOT get jizz out of one's flowing locks.  Trust me, I have tried everything for that.  I fucking love Schumer and her dirty mouth and her confident, sexy style.  She has no trouble being as dirty as any guy on stage on people laugh like crazy, partly because I do not think they expect to see and hear a woman saying the things she does.  No one is  ever ready for a woman to be dirty.  From Phyllis Diller to Joan Rivers and now to Schumer, we love to hear the filthy musings of a woman who looks like she could be selling us candy bars.  Be sure that the dirty women of comedy like Schumer get your love and viewing time.