Here Are The Top Most Important US Relationship Traits, According to Survey

Here Are The Top Most Important US Relationship Traits, According to Survey

What is it that we are really looking for in a relationship? And we mean a real relationship, not a Grindr date that you block right after the deed is done. But when we are looking for a meaningful, long-term partnership, what are the most important factors? DatingAdvice.com and the Kinsey Institute wrapped up their The State of Us: National Study on Modern Love & Dating in 2025 report. 2,000 American singles from across the nation were surveyed and asked what their three most important relationship traits were. You would think that looks, sexual compatibility, and financial strength would be at the top, but surprisingly, they were not.

We all know that most of the dating apps out there - whether we want to call Grindr and Scruff "dating apps" or not - weigh mostly on looks. Your main picture is going to determine if someone lingers on your profile or not. And let's be honest, looks matter. You can't tell your dick to get hard just because a guy tells funny jokes. But! We've all had encounters with hot guys where the sex is...meh. Or we've dated guys who are hot with muscled bodies, and after a few dates, we are either bored or realize they are idiots. So when it comes to a long-term relationship, we have to look at other factors.

According to the report, honesty is the top relationship trait that people are looking for. This statement has a lot of weight, especially in the gay culture, where open relationships, casual encounters, and gym shower jerk-offs play a big part in the dating world. In our Ask Chad column, he often deals with partners who have cheated or been cheated on - where's the honesty? On the flip side, at what point do we need to tell our partner if something happens - don't ask, don't tell?

The second most important trait is kindness, and in other words, compassion. The two go hand in hand. It is not a surprise that in today's day and age, with so much hate in the world, we don't crave some kindness in our relationship at home. It seems that even in gay humor circles, we are being a bit more politically correct and gentle in our approach towards each other. Is that why this current season of Drag Race is lacking? The sassy one-liners just aren't funny; they are just mean.

Physical attraction, shared values, and humor rounded out the top five. Of course, physical attraction had to be up there. As much as we all want to believe that personality can make up for anything, and most times personality does play a big part, we are all human, and we all have our natural and base attractions. There still needs to be a spark.

Financial stability, often ranked towards the top in necessary relationship traits, was only 13% of importance. Why has financial stability slipped down in priorities? Um, maybe it's because the economy sucks and we are all broke. Life has happened, and we've never fully recovered from COVID financial issues. The gays are definitely spending less on traveling, going out, and spending money at the bars. Our queer economy and financial priorities are changing. We're trying to make rent, much less buy Gucci sunglasses. We just aren't impressed with that right now; we are fighting for our rights.

The LGBTQ community differs from the straights in that political alignment is of high importance when it comes to relationship traits. Well, duh. The government is literally hell-bent on squashing our community. How would we be able to date someone in support of that? We also ranked emotional intelligence as of higher importance than hetero couples. We aren't playing around anymore. We need to date emotional equals.

What are your most important relationship traits?

Questions? Comments? Email us at [email protected]
Follow us on Twitter and Instagram.