Sex at any Age – Ageless Sex Does Exist

One-Third of Belgian Adults Age 70+ Still Desire Sexual Intimacy.

At what age does a sexual human being stop being sexual? Traditional mythology says women tap out during or after menopause while men develop erectile disfunction and have to rely on meds. With or without that advantage, we know that men can keep going well into their 70s and beyond. They can even retain fertility as elderly celebrities including Robert De Niro, Richard Gere, David Foster, Mick Jagger, Charlie Chaplin, and Al Pacino have proved by fathering children after they turned 70.

Sex doesn’t have to be centered around reproduction or even intercourse, though. This is true especially as we age. Libidos, abilities, and interests change with time. That doesn’t mean that physical and non-physical interactions of a sexual nature must stop. But they will change. Couples that maintain an interest in finding sexual solutions as they grow older are more willing to try new things, have or can develop good communication about intimate subjects, and focus less on what has been lost and more on what can still be enjoyed, have the advantage over couples without these skills and motivations.

For most horny elders, now is the time to prioritize nurturing a heightened sense of emotional intimacy and trust. This will make it easier to navigate the new terrain of physical pleasure and understand that things go better once performance expectations are set aside.

Research about sexuality is more available than ever but that doesn’t mean there’s a surplus to draw from, especially about adults who remain sexual into their elder years. The April 25, 2022, issue of New Scientist covered a study of 511 Belgian adults, the youngest in their 70s and the eldest in their 90s. The question that Adina Cismaru-Inescu from the University of Liège wanted them to answer was a simple one: how sexually active they had been during the previous year.

Unexpectedly, a third of the respondents replied that they had, indeed, gotten jiggy during the past year. Sex was defined as vaginal intercourse, anal intercourse, fellatio, cunnilingus, and masturbation. Those participants who had not had sex during that same span of time still reported kissing and cuddling their partners to express “physical tenderness.” As expected, couples with a more “permissive attitude” toward sexuality and intimacy were more likely to be sexually active. Likewise, younger individuals and those without a disability.

Cismaru-Inescu found that an impressive 74 percent of those who reported being sexually active during the past year also said that their sex lives were satisfying. Among the snugglers, almost 60 percent identified as fulfilled by the level of intimacy they could achieve. Of those involved in the study, 200 were in their 80s and 29 in their 90s. The balance consisted of people in their 70s. Even in the 21^st century, the idea that men and women with decades of AARP membership and experience with the Medicare system would have any interest in sex with anyone, including themselves, is a little shocking.

As Cismaru-Inescu puts it, “When we talk about older adults, we just have this idea that, ‘oh, these are just grannies and grandpas who like cooking and going for a walk.’ We don’t even think that they could have a sexuality.” Because of this, she and her colleagues hope to find if and how elder sexuality and their well-being intersect.

This may seem a strange area of study, but it has practical real-world implications. If we, our parents, or other elderly or disabled friends or relatives reach a point where an in-home caregiver or relocation to a memory care, assisted living, or nursing home are necessary, there’s no guarantee that a desire for sexual or sensual expression will have ceased to exist. Quite the contrary.

What to do with single and partnered people who need extra help has become an international concern. It’s bad enough that the World Health Organization (WHO) wants sexuality to be officially recognized as an important part of every adult’s life. Not just because it feels good but because it helps develop a sense of personal well-being.

This is great in theory, but Cismaru-Inescu and her team found that healthcare workers are largely unaware and unprepared for dealing with their patient’s physical and emotional need for intimate touch. Their Taylor & Francis article, The Elephant in the Room, observes that medical professionals are not only ignorant about the sexuality of older or disabled patients but don’t have the words to speak with them about the topic.

“Sexuality in later life exists,” Cismaru-Inescu states bluntly. “This is pure evidence, and it can’t be denied.”

Not only can the sexuality of the elderly not be denied, Cismaru-Inescu contends that it should be accommodated. “So, at different levels, we have to do something because healthcare professionals don’t know much about it and nursing home staff need to recognize that people want some time alone, meaning not just walking into their rooms but letting them have some privacy.”

How residents choose to spend that alone time should be up to them. Napping, reading, swapping some dirty talk, kissing, cuddling, watching porn, chatting with a camgirl, exploring their own exhibitionism on cam, making love, jacking or jilling off, exchanging saucy email, using toys, or crossdressing. Health care professionals have a lot of old people as patients and their needs have expanded over time. Already a difficult topic to face when it relates to the 18 – 60 crowd, it doesn’t get easier or less complex when the subject is sex and the object uses a walker.