Blasting their way into your mouth… wow does that sound wrong….
Hey Fleshbot fans! You may have seen the latest Oreo craze -- the Space Dunk. I tried them so you don’t have to! But you might want to, they are loads of fun. Let’s check ‘em out.
There have been probably hundreds of Oreo flavors released over the years. You can buy some of the currently available flavors on the Oreo website and peruse a much larger compiled list of past and present Oreos on Wikipedia including flavors only available overseas. They’re getting a bit like the international Kit Kats, with some truly wild flavors, and even Coca-Cola is jumping on this trend with some weird conceptual flavors of late, also including a space-themed one. Some of my favorite past Oreo flavor releases are Peanut Butter Pie and Brownie Batter.
These Space Dunk ones appealed to me because I love the galaxy/nebula color scheme and aesthetic and buy all kinds of shit with this pattern for my house. I love purple especially. The Space Dunk Oreos have cool nebula packaging and electric blue and dark pink crème filling, but a little bit of purple can be seen when you twist the cookie apart. The package and appearance of the cookie make them very similar to the bisexual pride flag. The crème tastes marshmallow-like to me and it has popping candy in it aka Pop Rocks so it’s a fun fizzy delight for the tongue. The cookies themselves have several different space-related designs, much like when the Super Mario and Pokemon ones they made previously had various characters. The package has a QR code on it and when you go to the site linked with it, you can enter sweepstakes to win an actual trip to space and play some cool AR games.
I’m inclined to agree with the dope meme above, especially since most of the flavored varieties seem to have the Double Stuf amount of crème and my most favorite of all is the Most Stuf, which is not made anymore, but the Mega Stuf that can still be found is a good substitute. Maybe I’m just waiting for them to sell the crème in a tub to eat with a spoon.
Since this is Fleshbot, after all, I have decided that my food-related columns will carry a rating on a scale of 1 to 10, rating the item’s compatibility with sex. For these Oreos and Oreos as a whole, I would give them a 5. Fun to separate and stick on the skin for use as edible pasties or other “clothing”, but with the colored crème it may stain your skin or bedsheets. Like any sugary product, I would discourage use near vaginas because yeast infections are not sexy. They also lose points because cookie crumbs in the bed are also not sexy. I see these as most fun probably as a postcoital snack because they do go best with milk (doesn’t even have to be cow milk-- most varieties of Oreos are vegan!).
No, Oreo didn’t send me freebies or endorse this post. I’m just a fat stoner who loves food. What odd or trendy things should I eat or drink and write about next? Tweet us @fleshbot on Twitter/X and give us your suggestions, but durian is a red for me, sorry folks!