The Sweetheart of Your Dreams May be a Sexy Chatbot

Loneliness is a Modern Epidemic, but Will Technology Help or Hurt?

A variety of modern experts with polls and studies have concluded that loneliness is a serious problem, especially for single men. Even a casual reading of poetry, literature, or song lyrics reveals that loneliness has been a scourge for centuries if not millennia. In addition to evolving gender roles and partnership preferences, geographical demographics further complicate things. Due to available professional opportunities, the majority of women live on the East Coast while the majority of men live on the West Coast. Inconvenient. Add the internet to the mix and while it’s easier to virtually meet potentially compatible mates, there’s no guarantee we can meet them in the flesh. Hell, they might not even be anything like their online persona.

Swiping left or right on a mobile phone app has lost its charm for half of adults under 30 according to 2023 Pew Research findings. Half of all users reported dissatisfaction with the quality of the conversations and the paucity of dates. When we do connect with someone online, the habit of “ghosting” is now considered acceptable dating etiquette. Ghosting is the practice of basically vanishing. No responses to emails, text messages, phone calls, etc., followed by being blocked on social media. This super sucks if you’ve left home and the comforting safety of your video display for an arranged meeting only to find out the other person did not bother to do likewise for you.

It's no wonder we feel alienated and alone, especially while we keep a cautious eye open for COVID’s latest mutation, forget how to interact with people in person, and still yearn for a loving connection. Likewise, it’s no wonder that those of us already comfortable blending technology and romance are drawn to the potential of Artificial Intelligence (AI). A March 2023 Kaspersky cybersecurity and digital privacy company study revealed that 75 percent of dating app users are curious about ChatGPT, an AI-powered chatbot. The reason? ChatGPT can come up with a smoother opening line in a shorter time. Be careful, though. Some users report that ChatGPT has lost its edge.

Regardless of whether ChatGPT has developed senile binary code disease, it has some serious competition. There is a growing market of potential lovers uncertain about how to make conversation, who seek a virtual shadchan, and some who are open to going emotionally deep with an AI girlfriend or boyfriend. Some specialists forecast that the day will come when AI robots will be able to fulfill both our emotional and physical needs. That should lead to some interesting changes in how we define relationships, sentience, cheating, commitment, love, and an assortment of other important but invariably controversial social mores and laws.

The beauty of an AI relationship is that it can be crafted to perfection. Romance.AI, for instance, allows subscribers to customize their dream darling to share interests and hobbies, know favorite foods and teams, and show interest in them and their well-being. More exotically, an AI chat with Mona Lisa, Queen Nefertiti, and other famous personalities is possible. Free or mostly free apps including Aimm, Rizz, and Teaser AI employ personality tests and keep track of our physical “types” in the hopes of increasing the odds of a suitable match.

For those who love browsing apps, OpenAI has its GPT Store available. There, we’ll find an assortment of digital companions, as well as a used AI chatbot market. Theoretically, OpenAI forbids romance-focused GPTs, but they still find their way onto the platform. And they aren’t just hot AI chicks with names like Secret Girlfriend Sua or Your Girlfriend Scarlett. Boyfriend Ben and his friends are also out there offering to be a caring alternative to the real thing.

There are a variety of ways an AI app can assist with finding human romance and Rizz.app and YourMove.AI focus on uploaded words and images to inspire the AI into a clever response for a conversation or toward our profile. Teaser.AI doesn’t just allow us to create a profile for ourselves, it also lets us select the kinds of personality traits we seek in a partner. Once the AI pairs potential sweethearts, it engages in a sample conversation between the two profiles. Then, the humans take the lead.

Most of us have only the vaguest idea of what we’re looking for in a partner. Apps like Iris and Aimm claim to help us get a clearer idea of what a compatible romantic connection might look like. Iris has its members train their AI by hitting “Pass,” “Maybe,” or “Like” on an assortment of images. Recommendations are made based on the results. Aimm dedicates itself to making matches that will last. A virtual assistant administers personality tests and serves up its suggestions.

There is a lot to be said for AI dating apps. There are also important cautions. Some people fall in love with their AI sweetie, which can become a serious problem. As well as the frustration that comes with loving an algorithm, in some cases they can be downright nasty, and not in a good way. Reports of sexual harassment and lies are not unknown. Some worry that obsessively service-focused AI girlfriends can reinforce stereotypes about real-life women. Concerns about online privacy, data security, and manipulation by cybercriminals make these virtual relationships a wee bit more realistic in that, like unwanted pregnancies and STIs in the meat world, it’s better safe than sorry in the virtual one.