FleshLinks 08-21-23

Here is this week's list of curated FleshLinks. Check each one below.

Bored and Horny, Dude? Seven Things to Jerk Off With.

It’s summertime and the fucking’s not always easy. When a partner isn’t available, a man must do what a man must do to keep his prostate strong and healthy, and that means masturbation. But what if you don’t have an expensive toy to stick up your ass or wrap around your cock? Pervertables are your friends. Bananas, pillows, fabrics, food, rubber gloves, and plastic baggies await your very real pleasure. Remember lube, condoms, and proper disinfecting. Click here.

Are You a Grower or a Shower? The TSA Wants to Know.

It’s easy for the average man in the sheets to feel insecure about the size of his penis, especially if he believes what his friends tell him or watches a lot of porn. But what about those whose dicks are determined to attract attention even when at rest? Does anything think about the hardships of well-hung men? Witness the suffering of a 36-year-old IT dude who keeps getting patted down by TSA because his cock and balls are so big! Click here.

A MindGeek by any Other Name is Still a Private Equity Firm.

When your reputation is in the dumpster and the dumpster is on fire, entering the Witness Protection Program is not a bad idea. MindGeek was accused of being a very, admitting any actual naughtiness very naughty porn platform manager. The company become the problem of the ironically named Ethical Capital Partners, which promises to champion “trust and safety” and fight “illegal online content.” As for MindGeek, you can start calling it Aylo and forget everything negative you ever heard about its predecessor. Click here.

Portland’s Club Privata Makes Models Swingers Without Permission.

Club Privata is Portland, OR’s “only upscale lifestyle nightclub,” and by “lifestyle” it means swingers. In federal court last month, it was called the defendant when 22 models sued the club for plastering their images all over its site without permission or compensation. Apparently, having 78 million Instagram followers like Cora Skinner or being Playboy’s Miss January 2001, Irina Voronina, means nothing when “Cinco de Sexo” needs a classy promo pic cheap, and you think no one will find out. Click here.

Florida Begs People to Leave the Fucking Manatees Alone!

Today I learned that manatees like gangbangs. One female, multiple males, close to the shore, in the shallows, without shame. Sadly, for the Pinellas County Sheriff’s Office, this freaks out people who don’t realize what’s going on and they call the cops because they’re worried that the manatees might be in distress. The up to 10-foot long, up to 1200-pound horny aquatic mammals love company and mate in herds called “aggregations.” It’s the solo manatees ya gotta call about. Click here.

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