It was December of 2017. Brian had just moved to a mountainous ski town in Montana from the much warmer state of Texas, looking for a new start. He had just left a high-powered executive position for a restaurant group and yet another failed vanilla relationship. I (Brenna) had spent the year previous healing from a divorce yet still allowing my friends to set me up with generic guy after generic guy. Both of us wanted something new, something more than the unfulfilling relationships we found ourselves in time and time again. We knew we needed to do things differently.
Half a bottle of wine and a very supportive friend convinced me to put up an ad on Craigslist Casual Encounters looking for a new “friend.” After dabbling in the world of BDSM for several months and loving every minute of it, I was finally ready to find a friend with benefits that could scratch that kinky itch for me. My ad clearly stated that I was looking for a dominant man to engage in an ongoing play dynamic with. I was not looking for a serious relationship, but I did want to develop some real trust and chemistry over time with someone who could dominate me in new and exciting ways. To no one’s surprise, I received no less than 200 responses. Most were crass or made it clear that they had no idea about kink. Brian’s, on the other hand, was so different: He was polite, well spoken, outlined his exact experience and what he could bring to the table. To say the least, I was intrigued, and a first “date” quickly took place.
Needless to say, that “friend with benefits” dynamic quickly went by the wayside. We fell in love very quickly, hating to even be apart for one evening. Because of how our relationship began, as something so casual, we found ourselves being more honest and vulnerable with each other than we had in any previous relationship. We told each other everything: Past relationship mistakes, sexual fantasies, the taboos that crept into our minds and wouldn’t seem to leave, and everything in between. It was the perfect recipe, we now realize, for a connection that would transcend anything either of us had ever experienced before.
The honesty and transparency we had led to some amazing conversations regarding sex, but the most important one in hindsight was some pillow talk one evening after an amazing night of passion. I asked Brian, “Is there anything you really want us to do but we haven’t done up to this point?” Brian hummed and hawed for what felt like an eternity, so I impatiently blurted out, “I ask because I really want to see you with another woman.” Brian’s entire face lit up with a smile, and he responded, “I think it would be so hot to see you with another man!” The rest, in many ways, is history.
Since that conversation, a beautiful non-monogamous journey has ensued. We began mostly as a hotwife couple, with Brian eagerly watching or listening to me engaging sexually with other men. He has always said he gets a lot more gratification out of me playing than him playing himself, so this setup has worked fabulously for us. In fact, we have become so comfortable in our hotwifing play that I typically engage with these men completely separately from Brian. For me, it’s a rush of excitement to know that I will be enjoyed sexually by someone else, only to return home to my soulmate who is anxiously awaiting the chance to “reclaim” me. Our sex life is at its peak of eroticism, all because we have had the courage to step out of the box of what’s “normal” in relationships and do what feels good for us.
About six months into our non-monogamous adventures, I came to Brian with the idea of writing a blog. I just felt like I had so many thoughts running through my mind, so many things I wanted to express about this newfound sexual freedom. We set up a landing page and went to work, but within only a few days, Brian came back to me and said, “This would be so much better as a podcast!” I looked at him like he had three eyes; We knew NOTHING about podcasting! But with some hard work and a lot of Youtube videos, we figured it out, and Front Porch Swingers was born. Each week, we share our real-life stories of swinging and hotwifing with thousands of people across the world. We shoot it straight in the hopes that our failures, fears, joyous moments, and everything in between will help other non-monogamous people feel less alone in their own thoughts and emotions. It’s sexy, sometimes even downright raunchy, but it’s also a heartfelt look at how a relationship can flourish despite not being what society expects it to be.
So, who are we? Tough question to answer in one simple writing. At our core, we’re a loving and devoted couple who just happen to love sex and everything about it. We’re people who have forged our own path and continue to do so in all things. We’re now sex and relationship coaches with an ever-growing clientele also interested in finding their own form of sexual liberation. And we wouldn’t change a thing about our lives or the way we choose to structure our relationship.
We hope you’ll join us here for additional writings about the world of non-monogamy. As people who dabble in kink, hotwifing, swinging, and now polyamory, we have a lot to share and can’t wait to do so via this amazing platform. We also hope you’ll check out our podcast, Front Porch Swingers! Above all else, we hope you’re having amazing sex and doing the things that bring a smile to your face!