The world of adult entertainment has things that many people could not even contemplate exist within its walls. This month, we sat down with Shay Evans. A woman who is turning heads left and right with not only the things that she does in front of the camera but behind it as well. In this interview, we get to see the woman behind the alter-ego in the best way. Like any other person, when I first saw Shay, her beauty was something that jumped at me off the screen like a tiger pouncing upon its prey. Shay is known to have one of the most glamorous looks that comes with a matching character that makes modeling on a runway seem like a walk around the park. Shay’s continued journey to the top makes a stop here at XCritic and what I was hoping to get out of her was nothing even close to what she produced. This is an interview that shows who and what a porn star really is and where they come from. So many believe that it is the hopeless and the lost that only join this industry. The truth is, it is more like the normal, the quick-witted and the kind-hearted who join this industry of ours. Enjoy fans.
Don Juan DeMarko: Honestly, it is the rarest of thing to see a “Puerta Ricenna” in Los Angeles. I have only ever met one other Puerto Rican who lived there, grew up and that is Mercedes Carrera.
Shay Evans: Huh, really? I think it is because my parents thought that I would not have received the same type of advantages in life out in Florida in comparison to California.
Don Juan DeMarko: I love it, babe. You know, when you first asked me, “how do want to conduct this interview. I was thinking to myself, I must find out about how you came to be a Californian. I always picture in the Bronx, my homestead, Puerto Rican’s have this fierce sense of family and home. I myself am a Spaniard, so I know how much the pride in our Latin ways always comes to the forefront in a lot that we do. What I had to find out, is what is Shay Evans like being you are a Californian. I think people from California have the most mellow personalities. So, I have been dying to pick your brain apart woman.
Shay Evans: Awwww, OK. Sounds good to me. I don’t know, I think I am kind of mellow, huh?
Don Juan DeMarko: You are simply awesome Shay. I mean, what I get to see as a guy who does the marketing side of things so much in the business is performers fail and succeed. I see a performer like you who puts so much effort into her brand and it is something very glorious to see. It honestly made me want to get onto paper, all of what drives you in this business and in life.
Shay Evans: Don, there is always a lot going on in my professional life and it is very hard to stay on top. I do not think that fans and our critics see how much is out there that a performer must do to stay relevant or to make a living. You always must be searching for the newest technology. You must be able to find the new APP that gets you to the fans quicker or allows them to find you faster. You must understand where “content” is going and what companies may be what helps you and what can hurt you. It is difficult to stay on top.
Don Juan DeMarko: Well sweetheart, you keep pushing hard. One thing I will tell you. I have been in the rooms with the directors, the producers when they are casting, and an indie girl has just as good a shot to get a cast as an agency girl if a person puts in that effort. Now that you are representing yourself, I think you are a good model for a lot of other performers to see how you can succeed in that department.
Shay Evans: Yes, I am so ready to.
Don Juan DeMarko: Now, this is going to sound like a load of bullshit, but the good lord blessed me with the ability to see many things within another person’s eyes. I could tell that you are a very caring spirit.
Shay Evans: Awww, that means a lot. I try hard. It is something I am always trying my hardest and that is to be a good person. There are a lot of things that will just hit you in the face in this life and there are times you just must take it and smile. I accept that you have to. Life is about all the extras that come with anything no matter the situation.
Don Juan DeMarko: Choice, it is such an important thing. People do not believe things to be that simple, but they are. It is your choice to see the world one way or the other and react one way or the other. I think two things are a constant in this life, patience will always bring about karma and change.
Shay Evans: I agree. (She speaks in a very professional tone but with this bounce that you only hear in a woman who has a lot of conviction behind what she says and does. That is the only way I can describe it as she gets set for the interview to really begin.)
Don Juan DeMarko: I can tell we will have fun already. The first thing I must ask you and this one comes from the XCritic readers big time. How did you find your way into this glorious business of ours? What path did you take?
Shay Evans: The story, the story… (She laughs so sweet and gently) Well, I was a swinger. I have always been a very sexual person. Right out of college things really came together for me. Before that though, when I was in college. I had just broken up with a boyfriend and I was ready to have sex. Well, let me rephrase that. I had sex before that, I just was not what I was expecting it to be. There were some fireworks, but we were missing the most important thing, chemistry. There just was not enough there. So, I decided that venturing off into the world, having sex with lots of people would lead me to a new place in life and it did. I kind of fell into this relationship that allowed me to discover swinging. Since then, I have swung a lot. We started to do that almost weekly. There were so many things that this person did that just made me so happy. It became a joke between me and my ex-partner. My partner would say, “hey, maybe you should do porn, you could really do this for a living!” From the beginning, when I look back at things, I think I just had it in me. So, we got serious about it. He got me an interview with an agency and the rest is history.
Don Juan DeMarko: That is a cool story. You know, one of the most beautiful things that I have ever seen about this business and it is something I wish the outside world knew more about, was that the true beauty of a woman can be learned from a porn star. Understanding one’s sexuality, it is the most important thing in this world, I kid you not.
Shay Evans: Yes, I one hundred percent agree with you. Being that I have been a part of the lifestyle for so long and now that I do porn, I feel so much more understood, mainly I feel like I actually understand myself now if that makes any sense. I believe in myself so much more when it comes to a lot of things in my world. I have this new kind of happiness that can not be described. There is so much more you see and feel and do when just basically explore sex.
Don Juan DeMarko: It is truly the most primal instinct and it is something that we all have. In my honest opinion, being a man who grew up Catholic, when you deny your sexuality and that sex is something beneficial and beautiful, it hurts a person in ways that are so deep and so scarring that some people never get over that. I feel you so deeply when you say that you discover yourself.
Shay Evans: Yes, and I feel that a lot of the issues that arise in things like relationships, marriage and so forth, come from a person not paying enough attention to their partner. There is such a thing as discovering what people actually want and how to give it to them properly. That is overlooked so much in the world.
Don Juan DeMarko: Oh yeah, oh yeah. One of the things I grew up with and you can probably relate to this as a woman who has that diverse background of different cultures with many goods and many bad. Cousins, friends, Familia, you can open up the door to any neighborhood that I grew up in I heard this every day, “Well, you are a writer, what are you going to be when you grow up? You think you are going to be a poet, that is what fags do. Is that what you are going to be?” My writing came from my love for women, from romance. Now that I am older, I run into all these macho men, who now shed tears into a beer and they talk about how much they wished they could have “been in touch with their feelings.” How much, “they actually liked what I did.” How much them not having an understanding of who they are has hurt the relationships they are in. I owe what I have and where I am at to my sexuality and embracing that. I feel blessed to have discovered that. I really do as cheesy as that sounds, and it sounds like you have the same story.
Shay Evans: I can relate to that big time. I think that we live in a different time now, where people can explore that a little bit more. Sex is not the taboo that it once was. I am really thankful for that as you are Don. Taking things a few more steps forward, I would love to see the day, where everyone was just universally welcomed in this industry, you know? I want to be able to run into family members and have them not look at me crazy because that happens still. My immediate family understands beyond that it is terrible and I think that it is always going to be a struggle, but it would be amazing if they could all move past that. Don, I think that is something I think that would benefit the world in such a unique way if we could get past that as people no matter the scenario and sexuality. I think it starts with us understanding it is not a bad thing.
Don Juan DeMarko: That is so beautiful. You know, discovering that I was hypersexual when I was younger was something special to me and for reasons that as I found as an adult has saved me from things such as stress and anxiety in certain areas in my life and history. I think a lot of us industry can understand that when you have that type of heart, that type of emotion that comes with such things, there are times you want to shut it off because of how the world can make you feel about it. That is where the real blessing occurs. Because finding my way to this industry, it is a blessing because of the acceptance and the understanding of having a heart and love you can not shut off.
Shay Evans: You know, I have never felt more welcomed in my life, I have never been so comfortable among people then I have within this industry. This industry, I really feel like I belong here, and I love that feeling. There is no feeling like it on earth.
Don Juan DeMarko: Yes, met too! I love it! (We are laughing with joy with a little high pitch whine in our voices. This is a subject that when you meet a like mind, joy just fills the room. The only way I can describe this moment.) That is what makes every single one of us a part of this great big beautiful porn family. I think that fans, “civilians” and “vanilla” folk, there is so much that is right at the tip of their fingers if they are just willing to scratch the surface in their own lives and see. Oh, I could talk to you for nine hours straight. So, question two darlin’.
Once again, I wanted to thank you for being a part of that Snapchat takeover. You were brilliant, and I really appreciate a performer who puts so much into things like that. Meant the world to all of us at XCritic. I simply must know, where did you develop this beautiful character you have. This mixture of hard work, professionalism, kindness, and honesty. I wonder if this is something you got from many loving ladies in your family.
Shay Evans: Um, I think it was a lot that comes from the fact that my grandma raised my mother and she was a single mother. I grew up with both of my parents, my parents are both still married.
One of the big factors that shaped who I am is that I grew up in this household where I was allowed to have fun, be playful. I think that matters so much when shaping any kind of person.
The one thing we never were, was hard on the other person when we made mistakes. That is what cast the mold for all of us to be shaped into these very loving people within my household. When it comes to looking at myself, the one thing I see and love to share is that I am a jokester, I love to laugh. That is the one thing that fuels my heart in everything I do, well laughter in the mind as well. I do not know, that is just something I live for, you know? (We start laughing.)
Don Juan DeMarko: That is something that is a necessity of life. You know, I think what the truth about love and what it really is has to do with laughter and happiness. I have noticed with the love of my life that all I yearn to do is smile with her. I want so desperately to see that smile on her face at all times. I love doing the little things again like love letters and seeing us growing old together and I think that laughter, acceptance, it plays a part in any and all relationships. See, now I am sticking with this relationship thing, well, more like courting a woman shall we say. With that big beautiful heart of yours, I simply must know, how many damn times in a day do you get asked out, woman? Since you were a teenager? Younger years? I guess to really phrase this properly, are you the woman who gets asked out every six seconds, or are you women who everyone is so intimidated by, that she never gets asked out?
Shay Evans: You know, I honestly have to say that is all a new thing for me. I want to say that within the past five years, I have just started to grow into myself. I had not always been a person that had that at the forefront of experiences. When I was growing up and I was younger, I was a loner and I did not really care that much about the way that I looked. You know, being “sexy” and being looked at in a desirable way it is something very new for me. Well, I guess five years is a long time, but it is all still something very fresh for me. So, to answer your question in the clearest way possible, I did not get asked out at all. My mother and my grandmother are very beautiful women, so I am not worried about aging at all and maybe that is something that has allowed me to be a bit more open to who I am on the inside.
Don Juan DeMarko: So, you are basically saying that you are finally going to look twenty-five when you are fifty? (We share a big laugh) Got ya! You are something special darlin’! You are simply walking into every question as if you are reading my mind, we have a wonderful mind meld going here. OK, so I am going to try and read your mind now and see if I still got this as I use to in my younger days. So, I have heard that you are a big nerd and I do love that if you are because I am a big nerd myself. I must ask this, what did you go to school to study? My guess, is that it is numbers, or it is science? How close am I?
Shay Evans: So, I went to school for interior design. I design psychiatric and Alzheimer’s units.
Don Juan DeMarko: Oh, my goodness, that is freakin’ amazing! How awesome! Even better, so that means you are a lover of all human beings. That big beautiful heart is what guides you always.
Shay Evans: Yes, ….
Don Juan DeMarko: Bless you, sweetheart. If you ever get to meet Kendra Lust, she herself went to school to become a nurse if my memory serves me correct and she is such a beautiful soul as well because she takes care of all of us. (I am speaking to her in a droopy, teary voice.)
Shay Evans: Awww, that is amazing. That takes a lot to do something like that.
Don Juan DeMarko: So, what is your passion for your fellow man and woman that made you pursue that line of work if you do not mind me asking?
Shay Evans: No, when I went to school, I kind of fell into the healthcare side of things when it comes to interior design. After I had begun this profession is when things started to hit home a bit more for me. See, Alzheimer’s runs in my family, so it is a very sensitive spot for me and my family. It is something very closely bound with so many of us. I have lost quite a few family members due to Alzheimer’s. There was this opportunity that dealt with these types of facilities and their design, so I applied, and I got the job. Once that I stepped foot into one of these facilities and I saw how run down they were and how much they really needed help I knew that I had to create something that was “home” for all these people. Most of the time people are taking their family members and this place they are taking them to, this is going to become their new home. I was discovering that most of these facilities felt like hospitals and not like a place to truly live. That was so heartbreaking to me. So, that is how it really became a passion within me, Don. I was determined to make these facilities become a little warmer to life and living. That is definitely what I accomplished.
Don Juan DeMarko: You know, what we have in common, my grandfather, he had Alzheimer’s and I take care of a mother who has the early stages of it as well. I am very familiar with the studies of the way that the mind burns so fast with a person who has it. I am deeply humbled and moved by your story. I mean that with all my heart sweetheart. Thank you for sharing that. Mad respect, wow. (I will honestly share with the readers that my voice had some tremble in it. Shay brought me to tears.)
Shay Evans: Thank you. It is a tough bout to have to fight with any family member. It is definitely not easy. Just going to these facilities and seeing all the different stages of this disease and to see the designs for all the stages of how things progress you get to fully understand what happens. Being there and witnessing it, it is so, …... it hits you hard.
Don Juan DeMarko: Oh yes. I mean, being that it runs in my family, I will not bullshit you and I hope it does not strike a painful spot in your heart because now I know it runs in your family too. I am scared to death to do the genetic test. Doctors have told me many times that this is where technology is. I always end up telling the doctors that being a guy that takes care of a family member with this type of affliction, especially when I seen it with my grandfather, I guess if I can stay positive it is that healthcare is trying to find solutions to that and I hope that they do because we need more people like you taking care of us in ways that bring a ray of light into our lives in any way possible when it comes to Alzheimer’s.
Shay Evans: Yes, I agree with you so much Don. We need more studies and we need fundraising that can make all these studies possible. I try to give as often as I can to the foundation that deals with a lot of the trials and studies here in California. The studies that are trying to find ways to slow it down are what we need because if we can achieve just that one thing, it would be so great. So, I do not think you answered if you have taken the test or not if you have the gene for Alzheimer’s.
Don Juan DeMarko: Nope, I have not. I am scared to death to take the test. I will not lie.
Shay Evans: I fully understand. That is one of the tests that I took, and I do have the gene, so it is a late onset. When I got that news I said, “Oh, well let’s try and live a good life.”
Don Juan DeMarko: Yes! (We laugh, and I think this is something that many will be able to relate to some will not. News that is grim can be taken two ways and Shay is a shining example of what performers are in this business, stronger than almost any other human being on earth. Stronger than me and she proved it with that story.) Being a man who has taken care of his Mom for over a decade, the doctors have been successful in making the progression go slower. It was dealing with my Mom that made me see that life is so valuable and that life is so short. You must live it and do the things you dream of no matter what those things are because how quickly time is always fleeting for all of us no matter how healthy we are.
Shay Evans: Yes, one hundred percent the truth!
Don Juan DeMarko: You know, the things you have touched on. You have shown a beauty about this industry that I have been trying to put into words for I do not know how many years now. People do not always see that about us industry folk. They only see the sex and not the sexuality. They only see indulgence and they do not see the living of life and the happiness that brings. Life is about enjoyment and it is sexuality that we bring to the table, but it is more about where we take that to in other parts of our lives.
Shay Evans: Now, you said it all right there……
End Part One
I can not express how much the lovely Shay Evans showed me something that I had never seen within another person. She showed a side that many and I do mean many people possess within this grand industry and it is a strength to go beyond what many people would dare not even try. She showed me that there is an even stronger mentality among the performers of this business. The fact that she took a test that basically tells of your own mortality says that this woman sees life for what it truly is, not a clock that is running out but as a way to better everything it is that you do with each day. Most of the time, we at XCritic get to bring you insight into the people of the industry and the humanity that has brought them here mixed with a passion few act upon. It is more evident than ever that the guts, the desire, the passion that lies within the heart of a performer does not just stop with their sexuality. No, it is something that starts in the bedroom, in the mind, whatever you wish to visualize this feat. Then they take that wonder and joy that comes with unlocking and surrendering to your sexuality and they apply it to all the things that they do. I would consider myself a very spiritual person but what Shay displayed in this interview is something I heard from one of the most beautiful performers on the planet, she once told me, “the girls of this industry are angels.” My goodness, they sure are. Part two is still to come fans and you have only got to see one look into the vast island that is Shay Evans.