Yeah Yeah. I know you've probably heard that one before. "Ryder" isn't exactly an uncommon name in the porn industry. With it being a sexual innuendo and all. But does anyone actually know what the name "Ryder" means? Granted Urban dictionary isn't exactly a refutable source, "Ryder" means A badass or a hardass, someone who is down for anything.
This being said, I bet your wondering why I decided to take all ten inches of the famous Ron Jeremy's massive cock during my first porn scene. Well, the reason for that is because "I'm down for anything." Being new to the porn industry, I thought that being DTF as people say, was a good thing. It turns out that I bit off more than I could chew…..or swallow…. Literally.
About half way through the scene, as I was RIDING Ron's dong, I started feeling a burning sensation. I figured it was normal considering the size of the silicone dick. "Is this supposed to happen?" I thought. "You know what? I don't care. Fuck this I'm sticking to girl-girl scenes." About five minutes later I was in the back of an ambulance screaming "My pussies on fire!" The EMT'S had a field day with this one. "This is hysterical!" one laughed. I'm glad they were having a good time while I suffered with Satan's flaming pitchfork shoved up my twat.
After an hour of humiliation the doctor finally pulled out the piece of glass that was lodged inside my Vagina. Really? A piece of glass? I mean I could understand if the dildo was at least glass but nope. Just silicone. So after reading about my RIDE to the hospital because of my RIDE on Ron's penis, I bet you aren't wondering how I came up with the name Addison RIDE-HER anymore.
Hope you enjoyed my first column! I have many more stories to tell... Follow me on Twitter @addisonryderxxx
for more funny porn stories! ( And of course to check out my latest work!) Oh, and don't forget to stick to REAL dicks, unless you want to end up like me!
Real dicks from now on,