Why I Am Thankful for Sex Workers

Sex Workers Are My Secret Culture War Heroes.

This month, Carol Leigh, whose activist persona of The Scarlot Harlot inspired many a sex-positive San Franciscan and beyond, left her voluptuous body and a legacy of excellence behind her. Without Leigh, the term “sex worker” would not exist. While it may seem a small thing, it was a game changer in our efforts to earn the respect of in-the-closet consumers and their enablers.

Simply put, working within what is labeled the “sex industry” is nothing to be ashamed of, but not everyone realizes this. Ancient moral codes can be difficult to outgrow and, alas, much legislature has been made based on them. Sex work is genuine work, not just a chance to tart it up at someone else’s expense. It can be intense, and burnout is a genuine concern for those who work as providers.

What, exactly, constitutes a sex worker is a matter of debate for some. I recently read a thread on Fetlife where a young fellow proposed that OnlyFans models are not sex workers, just models for still images. Apparently posing for explicit naked pictures doesn’t qualify a person as a sex worker in some people’s minds. For some, if there is no direct contact between consumer and provider or multiple providers as a performance, the work is not sex work. At least the term is out there so we can be called something other than whores, prostitutes, fallen, soiled, sinners, and other euphemisms and insults.

Sex work covers a lot of territory, some of which includes capturing moving images of erotic behavior and then displaying them for others to watch. These images require people known as “performers” or, in the modern parlance of our land, “porn stars.” There is little question in anyone’s mind about whether porn stars qualify as sex workers. Where they fit on the self-imposed hierarchy of sex work depends on how snobbish one is about the different kinds of work one may choose or find necessary to do. While it’s not been uncommon for female performers to work part-time at one of Nevada’s brothels, I have encountered porn stars who were proud of the fact they are not prostitutes in the traditional sense of the word. There’s a camera present. Therefore, it’s art.

I know that earns many a laugh from people who don’t understand the importance and potential of porn. When you realize that the genre depends upon the acting out of sometimes deep-set fantasies, you can see where art and craft can have value, even if they haven’t always been valued. Even some of my most woke friends scoff at the idea that porn can be anything other than cheesy sets, bad acting, laughable scripts, soundtracks by talentless brothers-in-law, and an endless series of thrusts followed by the dude cumming and any chicks pretending they came. But ask them about horror or science fiction or anything that requires imagination without sex, and they’re convinced it can be deeply meaningful, powerful, and artful. They’re right. But so am I. Porn is fantasy and the only limit is our imaginations.

And that is one reason that sex workers are my favorite culture war heroes. Whether we want it or not, we’re on the front lines and being fired on from both sides. The more socially liberal elements of society often mistake the work we do for the work of victims, seeing any time sex and cash are exchanged as a crime against our basic humanity. This says more about how crappy relationships between humans have been than it says about sex work or those with the guts to do it. Those on the socially conservative side of the spectrum think we’re all junkies, abused, and uneducated objects of pity, if not actively demonic.

If our first thought is not that sex workers, when properly supported, help ensure that the disenfranchised and the lonely will be included in the world of sexuality including physical contact, then our first thoughts about sexuality are probably not entirely healthy. Sex workers, who have all the same problems everyone else has, step outside of their comfort zones to provide not just fucking but solace, virtual and in-person companionship, even inspiration.

It feels increasingly like a cold and unfeeling world where it’s harder than ever to meet people, make connections, and be honest about what we want and need. This means the efforts of sex workers will only be more meaningful and necessary, however much that may offend the purists of both extremes.

As Annie Sprinkle wrote for her “40 Reasons Why Whores Are My Heroes” poster, “Whores are rebelling against the absurd, patriarchal, sex-negative laws against their profession and are fighting for the legal right to receive financial compensation for their valuable work.”

This doesn’t mean that every sex worker wants to do sex work indefinitely or that they even like doing sex work. But I’ve met few dishwashers who planned to stay in the kitchen until retirement. It also doesn’t mean that every sex worker identifies as an activist or even shows up for appointments on time. But the men and women who drag their asses to work and consider themselves to be apolitical are still making a statement because they exist.

The very act of being visible as a sex worker is taking a stand on bodily autonomy and the right to make economic and employment choices based on our own standards, values, needs, and desires. As we found with the LGBTQ community, the simple act of being open, unapologetic, and seen is a bold statement in the fight for basic human rights. Legislation supporting those rights is a big plus, too, and that’s where some sex workers get down and dirty by dabbling in politics.

As someone who’s worked in various capacities within the adult entertainment industry for 25 or so very odd years, run for public office twice and been the mistress of a gubernatorial candidate once, I feel qualified to say that politics is a much less ethical and wholesome endeavor than most forms of sex work. Sadly, in order for the golden-hearted whore to have the legal right to earn a little gold, the two must blend in an official capacity.

The trick, of course, is for sex work to do its magic, which is to heal, and for politics to do its magic, which is to legislate. I firmly believe that the future of the planet depends on those who’ve been forced to the margins of society but have retained the most love for life. BIPOC, queer, women, and sex workers are where I hang my hopes for the future. They all make us think and feel, two things we’re often discouraged from doing. And that is why I am thankful for sex workers.