Politically Correct: Woke or Weapon

When I was a child, saying please, thank you, and not offending people was expected by default. It was called “good manners” and could be boiled down to respect.

Political correctness (PC) refers to language that avoids offending persons of various genders, races, sexual orientations, cultures, or social conditions.

One of the most commonly stated goals of political correctness is the elimination of verbal discrimination and negative stereotyping.

The demand for political correctness is often controversial and becomes the source of criticism and satire.

Critics argue that political correctness cannot change the underlying feelings that lead to discrimination and social marginalization.

Political correctness is now a common weapon in the cultural and political war between American conservatives and liberals.

“Political correctness is bad, restricts our society and prevents progress that could arise by discussing difficult issues. It’s a form of censorship, goes against Western values and slows society’s progression. Political correctness merely prevents people from using offensive words, the motivation behind them remains, and views become more harmful once suppressed.”

I actually agree with this argument whole-heartedly.  When people can’t share their thoughts or say what they’re thinking- the feelings fester. And feeling oppressed and censored has never led to progression. But I only believe this is true for deeply difficult issues with polarized points of view. Unfortunately, it feels like every day, things that should be less consequential only gain importance to people who are unaffected by whatever it is they are protesting.

During the Defense of Texas Marriage Amendment Rally on Mar. 23, 2015 at the Texas Capitol. Source: https://www.texastribune.org/2015/04/28/supreme-court-looms-texas-republicans-strike-back/

I’m not, but for the sake of argument, let’s say I’m religious and believe the Bible to be the word of God. MY concern is behaving as I’m expected to with the ultimate goal of entering the pearly gates of Heaven. So please, someone explain to me why people (religious and not religious) seem so interested and even invested in who other people marry. As long as it’s two consenting human adults (maybe more but that’s not what we’re talking about today), who cares? Why do people care about struggles that aren’t their own? I wish the answer were empathy, as is the case of the person who lends a hand or supports another in  their struggle.

But who are we to judge other people’s choices? And even more so when they don’t affect us at all.

“Political correctness is necessary and useful in our society. It defines society’s boundaries and ensures the safety of minority groups. PC is also needed in society because it’s necessary in a civilized debate.”

I believe this is true for some simple, maybe even mostly unopposed issues of language and grammar. Like saying “mail person” instead of “mail man.” Or saying “sex worker” instead of “prostitute” because it helps dissipate discrimination a little, tiny bit.

But does saying that calling someone like me a lesbo isn’t politically correct PROTECT me and my community? No. It doesn’t help me at all and possibly makes it easier for someone who is trying to find a word to insult me. Because I am, as a matter of fact, a lesbo.

“Political correctness is neither good nor bad for our society. PC only prevents words from being said, the motivations and views behind them do not change.”

For example, in many cultures, public displays of affection are not socially acceptable. In this culture, being gay is also socially unacceptable.

Does that change the fact that I’m gay? No.

Does that change the fact that I feel affection towards my wife? No.

Does not seeing us being affectionate change how the conservative culture sees public displays of affection and homosexuality? No.

It’s my opinion that being politically correct, or not being, has no influence over what people truly think or do. Telling people that what they think or belief isn’t “socially acceptable” doesn’t change anything; it certainly isn’t a catalyst for change.

For example, I’m not going to move to a country where most people disagree with my choices and lifestyle. Not because I suddenly feel different, woke, and straight, but out of respect. Respect to myself, my wife, my choices, and also respect to the people who believe and feel differently.

Do I wish they became enlightened and sincerely understood that love comes in all shapes, sizes and orientations? Abso-fucking-lutely! But I’ve also met people who have very respectfully explained why, according to their system of belief, affection is expressed in private and homosexuality is a sin.

It’s easy to pass judgment when we’re sitting (hiding) behind screens a world away. Being mean, destructive, and heavily opinionated is only a few safe clicks away… but does that translate to the “real world”?

It’s also easy to point fingers and say I’m right and you’re wrong, but when have things ever been that simple? I met this guy in Morocco. We could say “he’s homophobic” because he thinks homosexuality is a sin and therefore opposes it. We- me, my wife, and him, spent 3 days riding camels in the desert and he never, EVER disrespected us or said anything even slightly offensive. He didn’t hate us or seem to have a phobia about us. He probably doesn’t have any feelings towards any gay person. Sure, he had preconceived ideas and expectations about how gay people look and act, but so do we about people who choose to live in the desert. He respectfully disagreed with our life choice and the feeling was mutual.

Differences can be beautiful and enlightening when there’s respect.

Frankly, I’m not very versed on the pronoun conversation. I’m a female, who identifies as female, therefore it’s she/her? Right? EASY. Why? Because gender is a non-issue for me. It’s  very hard to empathize with a struggle you’re not familiar with. However, due to the fact that THAT struggle is not MY struggle, MY opinions on the matter don’t (and shouldn't) have to affect anyone who is suffering because of this.

Source: https://time.com/5947032/elliot-page-2/

Elliot Page is a trans man. I’m sincerely not sure why that matters so much to so many people. His gender identity matters to him. So, if he wants us to call him, he, why does it matter? How does that affect me? It’s been a huge issue on Twitter with people getting banned and them censoring trending topics… but really, why do we care? Like I said before, it’s easy to retweet hateful, offensive comments on a discourse that is inconsequential to us. But it matters to him. So the only polite, respectful thing to do is use the pronouns that he has struggled his entire life to use.

“Politically correct: conforming to a belief that language and practices which could offend political sensibilities (as in matters of sex or race) should be eliminated.”

-Merriam Webster

My honest and humble opinion is nothing more than that. I use my words to grow and hopefully make this world a better place than it was yesterday. But the way to do that isn’t censorship. The solution isn’t teaching kids that “fag” is a bad word. It isn’t. It’s a word so it isn’t good or bad. It’s an adjective. What we should be teaching kids is that using words to insult, offend or belittle is wrong. THAT is bad.

Saying what I think doesn’t mean I’m woke, enlightened or wise. And that’s coming from a writer!