How to Tell Your Family You’re a Local Escort

Trust me- it’s better to talk to them about it than it is to wait until they find out. Because they always find out.

Being a local escort can be an incredibly satisfying and lucrative job. The freedom that comes along with sex work can be an incredible facilitator of a number of different lifetimes opportunities. However, working local means you’ll probably have to break the news to your friends and family, unless you want the drama and trauma of them stumbling across your personal ad. “A number of times, we’ve had escorts try and keep their lives a secret. It never works out.” Say the founders of Naughty Ads, a local escort ad agency that helps escorts and clients find one another.

“But lucky for you- having someone to break the news to means that you have someone who genuinely cares about you and takes a keen interest in your well-being.” They remind us. So here are 5 tips to help you let the cat out of the bag while keeping your sanity intact.

1.   Be Confident

Chances are, if you’re breaking the news about your position as a local escort to your parents- you’ve been in the biz for a while. Chances are also pretty good that you love your job. Many people (both men and women) who get into escorting do it because they genuinely love the work. They enjoy having an open schedule, making decent money, and spending time with people. These are all excellent reasons to love any job, and escorting really isn’t all that different from a number of other types of work. The resounding problem is the social stigma that is attached to it. So be confident in your choices and don’t let anyone rain on your sex parade.

2.   Be Clear

One of the main reasons that escorting gets such a bad rap is largely based on peoples complete and total misunderstanding of what escorting actually is, and what the job entails. I’m not suggesting you start doling out unsolicited blowjob advice to your mom, or give your dad a card for your favorite co-worker- but instead be honest about what you do. You don’t need nitty-gritty details to explain the nuances of escort work. So much of what an escort does is caring for other people. Listening to their stories and just providing them with some human companionship- because hey, people get lonely. It’s also important to make sure that whomever you're speaking with is clear about the fact that escorting is a job. It’s not a lifestyle. So be sure and let your loved ones know that you are still you, you just happen to have a job that some other people don’t generally like to think about- like sewage cleanup technicians and proctologists. Being a local escort is a job, and your clients have genuine and very human needs that they can’t fulfil elsewhere.

3.   Be Safe

Maybe the hardest parts for parents to come to terms with are the unspoken fears that they have concerning escorting. Mostly because they are conditioned to believe that if you’re an escort- you’re also on drugs and will most likely end up in a dumpster, covered in AIDS. This is just absolutely not true. While there definitely is risk involved in sex work, there are also ways to be smart about your position and mitigate a lot of that risk. Let them know about all of the procedures that you have in place that not only ensure your own safety, but also the safety of your clients, and any business you may be affiliated with. Oftentimes, just knowing that you are safe and happy is enough to quell the initial fears that your family and friends may have.

4.   Be Ready

Get ready for some serious backlash. Most times there are a lot of emotions that are going to be coming your way, particularly from family. But hey- you’re a local escort and you’re ready for this. Put those occupational skills to great use, and listen to their concerns. Validate their emotions and encourage them to talk it all out with you in a safe space. Try not to get defensive and really try and hear them when it comes to any concerns they might have for your general safety. Be firm, but also gentle. Sometimes it will take your personal conviction and fastidiousness to get them to come around. If you have doubts, they will definitely have doubts. Just prepare yourself for an onslaught of emotions that you may not have experienced from your close family and friends before. This is entirely acceptable and all a part of the process, at the end of the day, take comfort in the fact that you believe this was the right choice for you to be making, eventually they might come around to the same conclusions.

5.   Be Quiet

Yes. Be quiet. Sit peacefully and dig deep to find that Buddha-like zen you’ve undoubtedly got. Let them rage, and weep, and scream, and laugh. Allow them a space to air whatever grievances they may have. While it’s not necessary to endure this type of emotional overload for years on end, it may be required that you deal with it for a few weeks. Give them the space they need and try and be supportive of their feelings- even if it seems like they’re not exactly being supportive of yours. For many people, learning their son or daughter is a local escort can be a shocking and somewhat traumatic experience. Even if it never is for you personally.