Morning Wood

· Can one of the most illustrious asses of our generation be—gasp!—a Photoshopped fake? Vida Guerra, say it ain't so! (Drunken Stepfather)

· We might have to come up with a whole new name to describe this, since "anal fisting" using one's foot just doesn't seem quite ... er, right. In more ways than one. (.wmv video @ danerd.com - thanks Nik)

· Seth Stevensen at Slate watches that Overstock ad over and over again and decides it's all about ... model Sabine Ehrenfeld. We still think it's o-nnoying. (Slate, via Adrants)

· Uberpopular amateur model Next Door Nikki comes out as bisexual, explains inscruitable paw prints on her behind. (Ottyhotties)

· Attorney General Alberto Gonzalez promises to "proceed aggressively" with federal obscenity crackdowns, vows to stop using so much hairspray. (Just seeing if you were paying attention.) (AVN)