Morning Wood

· We love when we come across a news story that practically provides its own punchline: "Sex Doll Sparks Bomb Alert at Postoffice". Insert your own "surprise package" joke here. (Reuters)

· Er, should we be worried that our porn collection seems to have a few things in common with Michael Jackson's? (For the record, we always thought "legal" was the operative word in that Hustler series.) (Yahoo! News - thanks Sanj)

· As if poor Mary-Kate Olsen hasn't been through enough, she now has to suffer the indignity of not having anyone bid on her thong on eBay this week. Hell, even "Britney's panties" stirred up some interest before the auction was pulled. (eBay, via Defamer)

· Good news for West Coast readers: you no longer have to drive around Chatsworth or risk those pesky restraining orders to get up close and personal with your favorite porn stars! (prnewswire.com; more on "XXX: 30 Porn-Star Portraits" here)

· We're sure someone out there has already come up with a yawning fetish site—we just haven't found it yet. We're on it, kids! (Guardian UK)