Morning Wood

Maxim wants to sell screaming orgasms; UK's Channel 4 taps that royal ass; adult internet surveys you never heard of; and the most ill-fated adult film of all time after the jump. V. Blue

· Like when Hooters launched its airline and I dreamed of topheavy airline attendants serving me slippery nipples over Dallas, my mind is reeling at the possibilities contained within Maxim's new chain of nightclubs. (Adrants)

· Hmm, what to watch: Pamela Anderson roast or Princess Margaret banging her head on the wall while... banging? If I lived in London, no contest: "Channel 4's shocking portrayal of the life of Princess Margaret" (Telegraph, thanks George)

· In a fascinatingly Kinsey-esque way, Pew Internet and American Life Project has been asking adults about their internet porn use for the past five years. I can't wait until they call this girl. (Pew Internet, via Viviane)

· The curse of Debbie Does Dallas? Is that the one where the house tells you "get out", or the one where you watch the video and have seven days to live? Oh, I know—it's the one where you can't use Nair for like, seven weeks. (SMH)

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