Morning Wood

· We must defer to our little sister Wonkette for all the latest dirt on the CIA-hooker-WatergateGate scandal goodness. (Why do those D.C. freaks get all the juicy stories?) It's all a little fuzzy to us, but the bottom line is apparently this: if Osama bin Laden was actually a high-class call girl, he/she would have been "taken down" by the CIA director himself in about five minutes. (Wonkette)

· The New York Daily News is all over the story of an alleged foot fetishist who has harassed over 70 women on the city's subways, grabbing their feet and ankles and even licking their shoes. Doesn't he realize that there are plenty of places where he could do that to people who actually enjoy it, with the added bonus of not having to go to jail? (nydailynews.com)

· A thief in Pennsylvania made off with $8,500 in merchandise from a Victoria's Secret store, including 200 push-up bras. Police are asking folks to be on the lookout for anyone with suspicious cleavage and to notify them immediately so they can seize the evidence. (philly.com)

· Scientists say they have some proof that the brains of lesbians work differently than those of heterosexual women, and even resemble the goings-on in the heads of heterosexual men; all of which is very interesting, but it still doesn't explain the popularity of the Indigo Girls. (Sorry ladies. Too easy.) (sfgate.com)

* * * * *

Previously: Morning Wood Archives/Wet Spots Archives