Marital Aid Test Kitchen: Aurora Intimate Partners Kit

Nothing puts the "marital aid" in Marital Aid Test Kitchen like a doctor's words on a sex toy's packaging, and the Aurora Intimate Partners Kit has got that—plus an authorized signature too! Real life doctor Laura Berman says that women who use vibrators have "overall better quality of life," so you can rest assured that battery operated love is just as good as an apple a day. Maybe even better.

Read more about the alleged life- and marriage enhancing benefits of Dr. Berman's Aurora Intimate Partners Kit after the jump.

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The grand-sounding Aurora Intimate Partners Kit is not so much an actual kit as it is a cock ring with two vibrating eggs to put into its nubbly vibrator sleeve. It is, however, certainly for him (cock ring) and her (vibrator), and since these things are connected, it is indeed an aid for the marrieds (but it didn't burst into flames or anything upon meeting with my very unmarried bits). The most exciting thing about the toy—that there are two vibrating eggs—is also the most disappointing thing about it, because you can't actually use them at the same time.

The eggs, as seem to be the trend these days, have a variety of functions when it comes to pulsation and speed. The idea of the combined cock ring and vibrator is a good one if you like your cocks to be electrified, though some people on the penis-wielding end of things may not immediately cozy to the idea. The doctor-approved purpose of the device, of course, is to offer hands-free clitoral stimulation for the lady, which it does—but more as a pleasant tickle than full-on shock assault. Think of it as Electrostim Lite.

The cock ring, electrified or not, is a good one for dudes who haven't used one before. Its the kind of material that is so stretchy that an amateur wearer won't freak out about how constricting it is—or you can wear it as a hat. Which I don't recommend, because it will get stuck to your hair. And speaking of getting stuck to hair, the material is the kind of gummy that gathers gunk pretty quickly and will get gross if you drop it underneath the bed, and like me, keep yourself too busy getting laid to clean the dustbunnies. But then again, we guess that vacuuming the bedroom is a part of married life too.

· Aurora Intimate Partners Kit (erosboutique.org)

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Previously: Marital Aid Test Kitchen Archive