Morning Wood: Out of the Ashes

· Penthouse Pet of the Year Jamie Lynn gets naked on the beach, which we guess is slightly more exciting than when she gets naked everywhere else. (taxidrivermovie.com)

· Avril Lavigne is not naked, but she is drunk and that means upskirt pictures. Don't judge ... who hasn't been wasted and slumped over in the back of a Town Car before? (egotastic.com)

· Pompeii's hottest brothel reopens after 2,000 years. We hope Lola is working tonight. (ap.org)

· A former teacher's aide gets nine years in prison for stripping in front of her students. Nine years? She should have just had sex with one of them, and she could have been on Larry King instead. (abcnews.go.com)

· Another politician pulls out his opponent's sexy fiction writing to prove that the guy doesn't belong in public office. If writing about sex disqualifies you from the Senate, we guess our dreams of getting elected to anything are pretty much dead in the water. (drudgereport.com)

· Behold the latest in Japanese bikini technology! How it be-holds anything in place is a miracle of modern science. (Google Video, via doubleviking.com)

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Previously: Morning Wood Archives/Wet Spots Archives