Best of Sex Advice

Sure, we made our fair share of mistakes on the road of love, but they were our mistakes, and no number of embarassing trips to the emergency room will ever make us want to turn back the clock and do anything differently; back in our day, we didn't have all those interweb sexperts telling us things like how using margarine as lube wasn't a good idea, so we had to figure things out for ourselves. Really, though, which is better: learning from one's mistakes or benefitting from all that free advice beforehand? At least there's one thing we can be sure of: this week's installment of sex advice from across the web won't answer such gripping questions. But there's still plenty more enlightenment to be had ...

- - -

Nerve.com, Miss Information:

You don't ask an anorexic for a pecan-pie recipe, and you don't go to your ex-wife for dating advice.

- - -

Altsexcolumn.com, Dear Andrea:

What does it mean when a woman does the "walk and bump," meaning a guy is standing there minding his own business and a woman walks by and bumps his crotch with the back of her hand, when she clearly has room to clear without contact? I have asked females about this but I can't seem to break the female code of silence. I perceive several different reasons why they do this. but I want to hear what you have to say.

- - -

AskIsadora.com, Ask Isadora:

My wife of 19 years and I have happy hour every Wednesday. No kids. That is burgers, beer and sex. We shower together and have sex. My wife has a new trick: she can pee in the shower standing up. It's clear, like water. I do enjoy this. Can we get sick from this practice?

- - -

sex-project.com, Alternative Sexuality:

Men harnessing the power of fire... that really turns me on, even just seeing a guy light a match totally turns me on, yesterday I was watching my boyfriend start up the coals on the barbeque and I was so turned on it kinda worried me... do any of you have a fire fetish?? I wonder about this because I've never noticed this before...

- - -

allsexadvice.com, Kinky Sex:

Is it called snowballing... when a girl wants to play around with her BF`s cum in her mouth with him? I have always wanted to try this, but he is freaked out on tasting his own cum, and says that it does nothing for him sexually. I thought it would be fun to have his cum in my mouth, and just play around with his tongue back and forth a little. It just seems like a big turn on to me. What can I do, to get him to mellow out and try something new? I'm sure that he gets turned on, when I swallow his cum, or he squirts it on my stomach, ya` know?

Yes, he is the one, who is also freaked about me slipping a finger in his ass.

- - -

Eye.net, Love Bites:

I'm a dyke and hallelujah! I've finally met a woman who likes porn as much as I do. It's been an integral part of my sex life since I was down on it back in university along with my sisters in women's studies (I often wonder how many others were secretly watching it after outraged discussions). There's just one thing - my girlfriend likes gay male porn. Nothing else, and I mean nothing else, gets her off quite like watching two boys fuck and suck. My tastes are all over the place and I'll even settle for obviously fake lesbian crap because that was pretty much all I got for the first 10 years. But the gay boy stuff? This is a whole new thing to me and I'm a bit freaked out and, to be totally honest, grossed out by it...

- - -

netdoctor.co.uk, Male Sex Problems:

Ok, I have always been a heterosexual male. I have had many sexual experiences with a number of different girls and been very satisfied by all of them. I have also been extremely attracted to only women for my entire life.

Recently for a class I read that people discover that they are gay in adulthood without ever knowing sometimes. This has created terrible non-stop anxiety for me for the last two months.

I have a wonderful girlfriend that I love and have a great sex life with. I have never fantasised about or been attracted to men, but now I get anxiety from constantly asking myself if I could.

I convince myself that I am gay or going to turn gay and I have read massive amounts of information on the Internet about it.

I don't seen to fit the profiles, but I cannont get it out of my head. I also fear that my attraction to women will go away and I will slowly becoming gay. This has led to anxiety and depression and a little tension in my relationship because I am so distant. Can you help?

- - -

Gurl.com, Relationships & Sex:

omg! im sorry, but right now i am FFRREEAAKKEEDD out! Ok, so thier was this bulletin about thw average size of a penis, and someone posted a website, with pictures.

i know this sounds very imature and dumb but...wtf!i didnt know it was THAT big!!! how the hell is that gunna fit! And no offence to any guys but it was just, not acctactive looking. not that its supposed to, but i mean, i wouldnt epect it to be disgusting to look at! And again, i know i sound very childish when say this but, i think this had to be one of the worst experiences (form what i can remeber). 10 minutes have past and i am still in shock.

- - -

talksexwithsue.com, Talk Sex with Sue Johanson:

Sue mentioned on her October 29 show about eating nuts to help with ED and to help maintain an erection. Can you tell me exactly which nuts she said, how much and how often to eat?

- - -

askheartbeat.com, Dear Ms. HeartBeat:

Women that think just because a man says I LOVE YOU that he should be given a pass to the booty, a pass on treating her right, or be given her money, time, energy or allowed to move in or any of that are fools. Men say I LOVE YOU to get what they want from women because it works! Some women hear I LOVE YOU and they lose their damn minds! All signs of logic and reason and brain power go flying out the window because HE LOVES ME. (barf) Keep in mind he hasn't done jack to prove this, just said a few words. But you would swear the guy was Jesus Christ himself the way they cling to those words as the gospel!

- - -

thestranger.com, Savage Love:

I am a 23-year-old lesbian in a relationship of three months. In these three months, I have been tied up, spanked, cut, burned, and put on display for strangers at her request because she likes it and I'm GGG. My one and only kink is that I get a sexual thrill out of popping zits. She only gets zits when she's on her period and she HATES being touched during her period. She is also terrified that popping her zits will give her scars. I don't think she's being fair.

- - -

kinseyconfidential.org, KISISS Q$A:

I am a 22-year-old male who quit masturbating almost a year ago and am not sexually active. I am experiencing something I don't understand. I will be sitting in class and all of a sudden, the orgasm sensation will come over me and I will ejaculate. It's a messy experience. All of this happens while I am not aroused, my penis is not erect and is not being stimulated. Sometimes it happens when I am in a stressful circumstance. I have also experienced it while exercising. Is this some sort of signal that I will be a premature ejaculator? Should I worry about this?

- - -

puckerup.com, Open Up:

I read one of those stories in a really old Penthouse Forum: A guy takes a stick of butter and carves down one end to make it pointy, then sticks it up a girl's butt, and then humps her butt.

This idea really turned me on. (Wonder if that story was inspired by Last Tango in Paris?) But I am not sure if it's safe.

I understand that stuff you stick in your butt can be absorbed into your body, so it seems like a bad idea to stick that much fat, cholesterol, whatever is in a whole stick of butter or margarine into your body...

- - -

sexproject.com, Sex Questions:

Is it common for a person to have a fetish for something that is overtly sexual?

Such as a person being extremely aroused by/unable to orgasm without performing oral sex on their partner. Or a person being unable to orgasm unless using a particular sexual position.

I suppose it wouldn't be a fetish, exactly, since it would be sexual, but I'm not sure what other word would fit what I'm attempting to describe.

- - -