Trees Saved; Playgirl, Not So Much

We haven't been to a Hallmark shop in a really long time (all those stuffed things creep us out), but we're wondering if they might have a going away card that would be a appropriate for a magazine that's rumored to be shutting down soon. It shouldn't be too fancy--you know, no sound chip or anything that pops up--but should just have a tasteful message, something like "Sorry to see you go, Playgirl! Maybe you should've admitted teh gays were the only ones buying you all these years a little sooner!" Do you think they'd have anything like that? (Gawker; see also 8/4 update @ gayporntimes.com [i.e., it's true]).