Best Of Sex Advice: We Couldn’t Make This Stuff Up

January 24, 2008
DASHIELL

As some folks learn the hard way, if you're going to take the trouble to solve other people's sexual problems you should at least do your own work. There are so many difficult questions to answer out there that it isn't really necessary to make them up—or steal them from Dan Savage. On the other hand, Dan didn't even write his own column this week, so what difference does it really make who's giving the advice? Only one thing is certain: You people may have gotten older in the last seven days, but you haven't gotten any wiser.

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· Dr. Dick's Sex Advice (drdicksexadvice.com)

I'm a married guy with a great wife and 3 beautiful kids. A couple of weeks ago, I went to a masseuse I found on craigslist. I don't have a lot of experience with massage and thought I would be safe going to a guy instead of a woman. The guy was really nice and did a good massage, but somehow I popped wood near the end of the massage. I was really embarrassed, but he was like totally fine with that. Then he asked if I wanted a happy ending. I didn't even know what that was till he started to massage my ass and blow me. I have to admit it was totally amazing. I never felt anything like it before in my life. My wife sometimes will give me oral sex, but nothing like this. I blew a load like nothing I ever did before. I though my insides were coming out of my cock. I was wowed and scared and confused and I could hardly sit up. Then the guy said I had a real healthy prostate. I said what? And he said he was massaging my prostate while he was sucking me off. I can't stop thinking about this. I want more but I feel really guilty and I'm afraid this is going to make me gay

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· Dear Prudence (slate.com)

I've been married to a wonderful man for five years. About a month ago, I walked in on him watching a pornographic video, and I'm pretty sure he has no idea that I saw what he was doing. Our sex life is usually incredible, but ever since this incident, I've felt very down. Every time we're intimate, I wonder if he's just thinking about the women in his videos, I'm feeling less attractive ...

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· Love Bites (eyeweekly.com)

One thing we're both really interested in doing that we've never done before is having me penetrate him with a strap-on. Can you give us some suggestions for preparation so that the experience can be relatively clean and not too painful for him?

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· OpenUp: The PuckerUp Forums (puckerup.com)

just got the jeff stryker dildo ( a lil intimidating at first ) and was thinking to myself .... who many heterosexual males who visit these forums play with dildo's ???

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· Get Naked (timeout.com/newyork)

The problem, to be frank, is my pubes, which I never noticed until recently. On the top, they are the normal, curly, smooth variety. But on the underside of my testicles, it looks like the domain of an 80-year-old. They are dry, scraggly and palish yellow. What can I possibly do, short of having porno balls and shaving them completely?

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· Dear Deidre (thesunk.co.uk)

got so drunk on New Year's Eve I ended up sleeping with my boyfriend's brother ... There's a chance I could be pregnant with his brother's baby - or have caught something from him, since he's a real ladies man. How can I ever tell my boyfriend what happened and expect him still to care for me?

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· Talk Sex With Sue Johanson (talksexwithsue.com)

I've heard Sue explain many times why couples should not have vaginal intercourse underwater. What, if any, are the concerns regarding anal sex underwater?

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· Sex Project (sex-project.com)