You’re A Nation Of Proud Porn Consumers: “Liquid Gold 16”

Well, when I suggested I profile this movie, the kinfolk said, "Move away from there." Because the great Kaiser Soze conundrum of our time is how to classify the fluid that comes out of women on porn sets--and, you know, in life. Luckily, "Liquid Gold 16" is not about "female ejaculation" or "squirting" - it's about urination. Something people do every day, after the cake fart enema. (Note to the squeamish: all liquid has been removed from the post-gap images.)

Director Jim Powers is an auteur who can be trusted to "go there," and here he has compiled bits and pieces of scenes and backstage shenanigans to make up the 16th installment of a series that's got conservative porn producers pissed.

But it's not like Powers tramples fragile sensibilities willy-nilly.

"Don't let the property owners see you," he advises the (now retired) Lana Croft as she squats over a sink.

One would be mistaken to think that performers roll their eyes when Powers asks them to urinate, as if everything else they've done that day is somehow less graphic. In fact, when Chelsea Rae breaks in on Croft, Rae takes the sink next to her.

The disc includes golden outings by Holly Wellin, Sophie Dee, Serrena Marcus, Adrianna DeVille, and Sindee Jennings, whose aim and output is considerable. You may be wondering about the camera glare in Sindee's scene: that is the reflection off a plexiglass screen placed over the camera, which Jennings soaked from 15 feet away. And she isn't in the Olympics why?

Never say Fleshbot is too highbrow for you.

· JM Productions (jerkoffzone.com)
· Buy "Liquid Gold 16" (tlavideo.com)