Top Ten Hot Movie Moms Who Are Pretty Crappy at Parenting

October 31, 2016
HOLLY-KINGSTOWN

While "Stacy's Mom" (played by Rachel Hunter) has got it going on, what about Stacy? She has a boy she likes over and she's in the pool with him wearing a bikini and all the guy can do is check out her mother. That has GOT to suck on the self-esteem front! Seriously, frump it up a little for your daughter's sake when she has a boy over! Anyway, below are ten movie moms in no particular order who are truly hot chicks but just are epic failures on the parenting front. These MILFs are way hot and are emotionally damaging their fictional kids forever! Enjoy!

10) Jane Seymour as Kathleen Cleary in "Wedding Crashers" (2005)

Seymour is the political insider/hot mom of two very sexy daughters in this comedy, played Isla Fisher and Rachel McAdams. Seymour attempts to seduce her daughter McAdams' fiance Owen Wilson by showing off her fresh, new implants to him, putting his hands on those fabulous tits and demanding that he call her "Kitty-Kat". Meow! Still, though, not nice, lady!

9) Kim Basinger as Celeste Martin in "My Stepmother Is An Alien" (1988)

In this comedy, Basinger plays an alien who marries hapless widowed astronomer Dan Ackroyd to get close enough to him to steal his research. That's a pretty hurtful thing to do to a family! Ackroyd's daughter played by a young Alyson Hannigan figures out what is going on with Basinger and no one believes Hannigan at all. While Basinger does end up becoming really fond of her earth daughter over time, all of that lying and undermining of Hannigan is a shitty thing for a mom to do whether she is a mother from space or not.

8) Halle Berry as Leticia Musgrove in Monster's Ball (2001)

Berry's rack in this film that won her an Oscar for Best Actress is impeccable. Wow, those are some fabulous tits. I'm not saying that Berry's character did not have a lot of shit to deal with - having an ex-husband on death row (played by Sean "Diddy" Combs) while trying to raise a son can't be easy. Berry plays a mom who lets her kid get morbidly obese. The kid gets hit by a car and dies in this drama and well, I just can't sign off on Berry's character being a winner at the whole parenting thing.

7) Kate Winslet as Sarah Pierce in "Little Children" (2006)

Winslet and Patrick Wilson's characters play two lovers each cheating on their spouses in this very sexy drama. We get to see a whole lot of Winslet's curvy, lovely body, but the two are way too busy flirting with each other and having fabulous-looking sex on top of major appliances to really be all the way present as parents.

6) Angelina Jolie as Grendel's Mother in "Beowolf" (2007)

Jolie is one of the hottest moms ever in this movie - fuck, she is fine. However, she LITERALLY raises her son (played by Crispin Glover) to become a monster in this hot CGI action/adventure tales based on the old English poem.

5) Demi Moore as Erin Grant in "Striptease" (1996)

Moore plays a mom who loses custody of her 8-year-old daughter to her criminal husband because the judge is not happy that Moore is unemployed and unable to provide for the child. She gets a job as a stripper, showing us all those luscious jugs as seen above. She, however, bitches and moans about the job way too much for my liking to show that she is really invested in getting that kid back. STFU, Moore and go wrestle another chick in that kiddie pool filled with creamed corn! Quit your bitching!

4) Jennifer Coolidge as Stifler's Mom in "American Reunion" (2012)

She birthed Stifler and while she is hot and nice enough to get stoned with and later on blow Eugene Levy, she still raised Stifler and must be held responsible.

3) Julia Roberts as Erin Brockovich (2000)

Roberts won a Best Actress Oscar for her work in this true story about a single mom fighting for the environment. Brockovich's three kids are pretty open about how neglected they feel throughout the movie and putting the kids in the position where they end up feeling that kind of resentment just sucks. Way more communication and balance shoulda happened.

2) Jennifer Lawrence as Rosalyn Rosenfeld in "American Hustle" (2013)

Lawrence is incredibly gorgeous in this movie where she plays a terrible mom who sets the kitchen on fire regularly with her cooking and gets drunk enough in public that she falls out of her chair. Ouch.

And lastly...

1) Faye Dunaway as Joan Crawford in "Mommy Dearest" (1981)

So I am kinda cheating on this one because, well, you have to be a pretty special, unique individual to find Dunaway's performance as abusive mom/movie legend Joan Crawford particularly sexy. It really does not get much worse for parenting than the shit we get to see Crawford do in this movie adaptation of Crawford's adopted daughter's tell-all memoir and Crawford is STILL hot as fuck still under all of that fucked up shit. I am showing her above in "Chinatown" but here she is being the antithesis to anyone's version of Mother of the Year.