Go Oakland As!
Weird Universe has this very entertaining and educational tale (heh) of a very, very hardcore baseball fan who decides to celebrate the Oakland As victory in the World Series by having his partner (the gender of this lucky person is not determined by the article) jam a baseball up his hopefully lubed asshole. The full story of this epic experience appears in "Diseases of the Colon & Rectum" from January 1977 - a fine publication that I apparently need to buy back issues of.
Highlights of the baseball up the butt-themed victory celebration include the fact that the doctor could only barely touch the baseball because of how far up the guy's rectum it was and how the A's fan had to have surgery to remove the "swollen by fluid" baseball that was lodged in the guy's sacrum. A surgical corkscrew was eventually used to get the ball out.
The only toy or item to put up anyone's asshole is one with a flared base so that it can be retrieved easily. Some people in porn also did not get the memo on this safe sexual play issue and in a behind-the-scenes of a otherwise great porno I just watched had footage of a female porn star freaking out because she had one of these jammed way too far up her ass. The shooter just continued to shoot the whole thing while she was a bit panicked and the other performer in the scene talked her down from the fear so she could relax her ass and slowly work it out of her. That girl was really fortunate to have not have had to go to the ER.
To buy some things actually intended for anal sex use, you can shop in our store and look for toys that have that flared bases or you could go with fisting or someone's dick. Either way, you will probably have to skip the whole emergency room experience.