Behind Closed Doors: What’s the Deal with Squirting?

I'm gonna be real with you: I have never squirted. I've seen a million videos of it, of course. A bunch of friends do it, and when I hear their stories, I listen in wide-eyed wonder, questioning when, if ever, I'll experience this pinnacle of female pleasure. I had so many questions—what is this liquid? Where does it come from? Did I miss the sign-up for this sexual ability?! They say squirting is essentially involuntary peeing, but then I see this:

That's not diluted urine, is it?! And what about this? Is this really a thing that goes down in people's bedrooms?? 

This seems more attainable:

But then I see this and I'm like wow, do I even drink enough water to do this? Maybe I should drink less coffee. 

For those of us who don't squirt on the reg, the barrage of squirting stories is confusing. For women who do squirt, it's still confusing. For pretty much all men, it's confusing. This mystical, magical power seems like an exclusive club that selects its members at random, sort of like Hogwarts and the Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders. Nonetheless, I've hear that technically, speaking from a biological stand point, we can all squirt—so I set out to do some research (again) on the matter and figure out what exactly squirting is, who can do it, and how we all can collectively try it at home. Here goes.

(Note: No mattresses were harmed in the making of this article.) 

What, exactly, is squirting?

Things we all know: When a girl squirts, watery fluid shoots from her urethra (that's the pee tube, and it's how all you dudes come, too). The liquid is relatively clear for the most part, though some women's fluid is a little milkier (see: above GIF). It's sort of sweet smelling in most cases and generally just seems like water.

What is in constant dispute: Where the liquid comes from, if female ejaculation and squirting are, in fact, the same thing, and if everyone can do it. Things not in dispute: It's one of the most searched terms on almost all major porn sites, including ours.

Fear not: thanks to the Journal of Sexual Medicine and several first-person squirting recounts from my friends, I do have a few answers for you, and I think they will improve all our sex lives (yes, even you dick-bearing creatures). Shall we? 

First things first: the G-spot. Let's talk about it. We love to hate it, hate to love it, and we're always trying to find the damn thing, as it's always disappearing on us. Sort of like Harry when he's wearing his invisibility cloak. (Sorry, I'll stop with the Harry Potter references.) The G-spot is really more like a three-piece band, with the vaginal wall on the mic, the clit on the drums, and the urethra on the guitar. It's way easier to find after a woman has come, so you should probably go tackle that first. You heard it from me: Everything about sex is easier if you make a woman come before you enter her. (Don't worry—I'll write an article about how to do this, too.) 

Now, I've mentioned that the G-spot, whatever it is, feels a little like a peach pit and is located an inch and half to two inches up the vagina along the front wall. It swells up when a woman is turned on or has just come (as I was saying), and the glands around it (like the Skene's Gland) can fill up with water as you're making sexy time. According to a recent study by the Journal of Sexual Medicine, a woman's bladder can also fill partially up with water due to this sexual stimulation. It doesn't technically matter where this lady jizz originates; the point is: Something in the vag region is filling up with clear liquid. 

There's also a dispute between female ejaculate and the stuff that comes out while a woman is "squirting." Female ejaculate is said to be a much smaller, more viscous amount, though this differs from the vaginal fluid that is secreted when she's just come and is super wet. Yes, you heard that right: There are up to three different kinds of liquid coming out when she's super turned on. That recent study by the Journal of Sexual Medicine suggests that squirting is really just emitting super diluted pee, while other docs are like nahh, it's a little different. Whatever, man. It's diluted something-or-other and it's sterile. Moving on. 

Why does it happen?

Anyways, back to the G-spot. The reason that elusive minx is in hiding sometimes is because it swells during sex. (Again—mostly after her first orgasm. I'm no doctor, but I'm starting to feel like woman have clits purely because we are all supposed to orgasm before sex. I should put that on a T-shirt.) The tissue around the G-spot fills with blood, just like your boner does when you're turned on. This gives whole new meaning to the phrase "lady boner." 

So now you have a visual: You guys are having the sex, and her downstairs is swelling with both blood and liquid, making everything feel one million times better for her. The rhythmic pressure of your peen is pushing on her urethra (among other things—you're taking up a lot of space in there), which can push the fluid out. This brings me to the good part: Why does liquid sometimes come out and sometimes not? Here's what I've gathered:

• First, she needs to be hella turned on. Not just like "ooooh, this feels good" turned on, but like, she-just-came-or-will-soon turned on. (I'm telling you to go down on her again.)
• Next, you need to be making repeated contact with her G-spot. There are many ways to do this, but I don't have the patience to go into it in this article so I'll leave you with this. 
• Then, she needs to completely let go. This is easier said than done—women who fill up with a lot of this liquid frequently feel like they need to pee at this moment in time and will clench up their PC muscles. Squirting, like any female orgasm, requires complete abandonment. More on that later.

How do we do it? 

All that said, squirting usually happens on accident. Much like watching water boil or trying to become a teenage boy wizard, you're less likely to succeed when you're worried about it. If you're a dude, focus on getting her off early  (and more than once) and finding her G-spot, which is a little different on each woman.

If you're a lady, experts suggest going to the bathroom before sex to help you feel more comfortable when you get that I-need-to-pee feeling. When that happens—and here's the hard part—you have to go with it. That means not only resisting the urge to clench those muscles, but bear down on them like you're actually trying to pee. Whatever liquid is coming out (diluted pee, female ejaculate, vaginal fluid, unicorn's blood, whatever), you're not actually peeing. And if that's not enough incentive, think about this: I know women who squirt, and they say the orgasm is out of this world. I like the sound of that. A cool thing you can do is practice solo—by giving yourself a clitoral orgasm and then going in with a toy designed to hit the G-spot.

G-spot location and sensitivity varies so much from person to person that some women never squirt. The takeaway, however, is that you need to be communicating your partner about what feels good, and she needs to totally relax and give in to the sensations she's feeling. That requires trial and error (plus a no-judgement zone) from both parties. Women who are dead-set on squirting can help themselves along by doing their Kegels.   

TL;DR: Your GF can probably squirt, we have no idea what the mysterious liquid is, and you should probably go down on her if you want it to happen. Yeah, you should definitely go down on her.